"No. Bloody. Way. You have GOT to be kidding me!" Was the first thing Ben was able to utter. Mary shot him a venomous look that Lily swore would wilt one of the pretty daisies in the meadow. She stifled a giggle.

"Watch your tongue, young man," scolded Bert affectionately, a twinkle in his eye, "that is no way to talk in front of a fine pair of ladies."

"Thank you, Bert," Mary said gratefully. Lily watched curiously as the two very strange adults looked at each other for a little longer than necessary.

She, on the other hand, was enraptured with the unicorn, it wandered slowly towards her until it was close enough for her to touch. She held out her hand and the creature blew a snort of hot breath onto her skin and she laughed joyously at the tingle.

"Come on now, dear, we had best be setting off for the races." Mary took hold of Lily's hand and struggled a little until Ben's was firmly in her grip. The look on his face was priceless and he shot his sister a glance that threatened to end her life if she dare spoke of this event to anyone.

"Now, which way is that carousel?" Mary enquired more to herself than her companions.

"I'm afraid the 'orses moved out a little while ago, Meery" drawled Bert, "they have somethin' very different nowadays."

"Oh?"

"Yes, apparently there is a fair instead"

"Marvellous, we can take turns on the coconut shy and see the strongman and have our palm read by Nanny Ogg: the Fabulous Fortune-teller of Faraway!" She gushed to the children, expecting their eyes to glow with excitement. The blank look on their faces brought her hopes crashing down. Bert coughed in order to gain her attention.

"It's is different sort of fair. They have this device called a 'roller-coaster' - whatever that is - and big stalls with lots of stuffed animals to be won from shooting paint at targets. In guns!" He explained and watched as the smile on Mary's face tightened a little and the children started moving eagerly on the spot, anxious to get there.

"Let's go Mary!"

"Please!"

She looked down at the children and sighed. Today was becoming rather draining. She looked down at the children and squashed the growing dread. She squared her shoulders, smiled at the children and declared "Lead the way!"

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Author guidance for This story

Yes. A Mary Poppins fan fiction, of all things. Inspired by Faltarego's "Protagonize Character Placement Agency Story. Suggested cast: Mary Poppins (of course) Janice Chandler Roy Chandler - her husband. Ben Chandler, age 13 Lily Chandler, age 10 Rory and Ronan Chandler, the twins, aged 3 Tiger the cat Bert the Chimney Sweep (with compulsory shockingly awful Cockney accent - eg. pronounces Mary's name as "Meery Popp'ns", and will have an air of bewilderment at the fact that he is doomed to unemployment in this century.) Assorted Cartoon characters Several "guest" fictional nannies whom Mary has met on her travels: Nanny McPhee/Nurse Matilda Mrs Baylock (from "The Omen") Euphegenia Doubtfire Nana the dog, from "Peter Pan" TV Nannies: Jo Frost - Supernanny Nanny Deb, Nanny Stella and Nanny Yvonne, from Nanny 911 Go wild!

updated Feb 9 '09 by Tasha_Noble