Dear Twidsaa.....(Never mind!)

I seriously feel that you should not berate yourself so much over such a liitle matter. You did the right thing by writing to me.You can simply sell your soul on e bay for 50 cents. You will be amazed by the number of people who will actually bid for it. That will take care of your fear. Then you can press the delete keys for as many times as you like.

Love,

Marius.

P.S. Please forward me the contact details of the guy who buys your soul. I might just be able to sell him some junk.

Well, that is settled.

I got an equally interesting problem the other day.

Dear Marius,

I like this girl in my class. I have been trying to tell her about my feelings since a long time but have been unable to do so, because she thinks I am gay.I don't have any proof that I am not since I have never had a girlfriend before.Please help.

Yours,

Troubled striaght guy.

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Marius is terrible at his job as a newspaper Agony Uncle, but fully believes that he's great. Each chapter should start with Marius' reply to the previous problem, and then pose another one for him to answer. I've started with a letter and a reply in the first chapter so you can get the gist of what he's like, and the sort of thing he considers to be good advice. Have fun!

updated Oct 22 '08 by Tasha_Noble