I just found this interesting entry in Luke’s journal:
“I’ve now been dressing as a girl, and mum’s been diapering me at night for a while, and I don’t mind (so much) anymore. I‘ve actually begun saying ‘no’, when she asks if I want to return to dressing like a boy, and getting rid of the diaper routine. She doesn’t know it (or at least I don’t think she does) that I saw through her little charade, about an hour after it had begun. I therefore already know she would love to turn me into a real girl; as much as possible, at least. And besides; I’ve already met so many kids who will be in my class; it’ll be difficult for me to go back! I’ve improved on moving as a girl, and thinking like one, so much it nowadays comes natural to me.
However, why she is insisting on diapering me at night is way beyond me, but I’m guessing she’ll tell me, sooner or later.”
Mm, he’s right about that last part; as soon as I’ve figured it out myself. So, he saw through my little charade pretty quickly, did he? Well, if he thinks he can keep a secret; so can I.
He’s starting school in a couple of days, so I guess we’ll have to find some more clothes, suitable for my purpose. On the Net, I found a lifelike prosthetic devise for him to wear in school, which hides his private parts, but allows him to use the girls’ bathroom, without anyone knowing. It also makes it easier for him, when he has to change clothes before and after PE-classes. It is even shower-proof, so that shouldn’t be a problem. I just have to paint it more or less the same colour as the rest of him and glue it on properly, so there are no visible edges anywhere, and I’ve come up with the name Lulu.
YES! He’s been in his new school for a couple of days now, and no one suspects a thing! Or at least he says no one does, and I’m sure he’d tell me. Another good thing is that they use school uniforms, which for girls consists of a white frilly, long-sleeved blouse, a grey, ¾ length wool skirt, and grey wool tights. I was afraid he’d have to abandon wearing skirts almost entirely, and now I’m much calmer.
The next things I’ll have to get him are some stays to use when he doesn’t have to undress, to start making his figure even more girl-like. Eventually I’ll have to get him a corset and hormone-therapy, but I guess that’ll have to wait a while.
When I now read what I wrote back then, I find it almost impossible to comprehend Lulu originally was Luke, a boy whom I started dressing in girl clothes, mostly for fun. She’s improved so much that the boy I gave birth to 13 years ago is all gone! That fact makes me both sad and happy. It makes me sad because I did love the boy, but glad because the experiment was such a resounding success, and I love my new daughter with all my heart.
One thing I changed from the original plan was I never put him, sorry her, in stays; I went straight for the corset, as I saw them in a size which would fit her perfectly, even though she’s not fully formed yet. As she grows older, I suppose I’ll have to start ordering custom-made ones but for now, “off the shelf” will have to do.
Luke/Lulu: I think I’m getting better and better at pretending to be a girl, and because of that, it’s more and more fun! I asked mum the other day, when it was time for me to go on to the next stage. “Soon,” she said. I really hope it will be soon, because I suppose I’m starting to get into puberty, and when that’s over I’m going to have grown a beard and having a dark voice. That’ll ruin everything we’ve tried to build, for sure.
Mum: Today I contacted a specialist who’s prepared to start giving Lulu her hormone-replacement therapy, and perform the necessary surgeries. He said it was a good thing I contacted him when I did, as the transition to adulthood hadn’t begun yet. Now, it would be much easier for her body, and brain, to accept the change in hormones that would occur. She’ll have to have the surgery done as soon as possible. We scheduled it for the Christmas break in a few weeks; that way, she’ll have time to come to terms with the fact. To tell you the truth, I think she be overjoyed to get rid of the prosthetic devise between her legs, as it frankly looks a bit uncomfortable to wear.