“Brother, what are you doing out here? It’s freezing! Get back inside quick – before you catch a nasty cold! You silly boy,” came the voice. Dylan almost hugged his sister. He got up as soon as he heard her voice and turned around, to see it was really only Suzy, no one else.

“Yes I will. Thank you for opening the door for me and please don’t tell anyone I’ve been out,” Dylan told her.
“Well of course, Charlie told me, so I already knew – but it was weird, why didn’t you just come inside?”
“I didn’t want to... I hate home because it’s not one.” was what Dylan had wanted to tell her, but it came out as, “Yes – I forgot, I was too busy thinking about some things.” He smiled at her to hide his cover.
“Okay... right, anyway Charlie helped you cover – just remember: you went to the library and you went to see the teacher about some science homework. Then you went to print off my homework. Got it?”
“What? I never did that.”
“Shush! Do you want father to hear you now? Look just go along with the plan and everything will be alright, okay?”
“No – I don’t, but what about the homework that I printed off for you? I don’t have any evidence of that! Do you guys have a back-up sheet?”
“Yes – I do, like I said, Charlie and me have everything covered. Just make it look like nothing’s happened.”
Just then, Dylan’s father came marching down from the corridor, footsteps getting incredibly louder as he came nearer. Dylan kicked off his shoes as fast as he could and Suzy passed his a bunch of paper.
“Hey Dylan – so where’s my homework? You better have it – I’m going to get eaten alive by my teacher if you didn’t print it off,” Suzy said loudly, looking at Dylan in the eye with her back turned to her father, so he couldn’t see what face she was pulling. She gave Dylan a stare that made him reply back quick.
“Oh – it’s here, in my pocket. The pictures couldn’t come out in colour – is that alright? It’s in black and white.” Suzy took the pieces of paper and went through each page.
“Yes, it’s just the way I wanted it! Don’t worry about the black and white – I can always just do some colouring around the pages. Thanks for printing it. I thought you were going to forget.”
“It’s okay, just remember, you have to pay me back – those sheets cost a total of 20, 40, 60.... About £1 altogether.”
“I will – just wait until I get some money, I’ll give it back as soon as I can.”
“Okay – well I’m going up to get changed now.”

Dylan walked up the stairs, really wanting to run up, but he held back until he was out of his father’s view before he ran to his room and shut the door quietly. He breathed in and out slowly. “So scary... So close... Gosh, I don’t know how much to thank Suzy and Charlie for the well thought plan,” he thought to himself.

He got changed quickly and then he finished the day by completing his homework. “Imagination... Thoughts... what have they got to do with what I want? Does he want me to imagine that I am doing what I want so I can feel better that way?” Dylan asked himself. He thought for a while thinking all about it – how it fitted in with what he wanted, he racked his brains for the right answer but still no answer fitted it perfectly. In the end, he gave up trying to work it out. No-one had ever said something so thought-provoking before, so when he was given that advice from the man, he tried hard to work out what it meant. He leaned back in his chair, continuing with some extended tasks from his workbook. Suddenly his stomach rumbled loudly. Dylan looked down at his tummy. He had been so busy the whole of the day, that he didn’t realise that he hadn’t eaten since 12 in the afternoon and it was 8 in the night now.

He finished off the question he was working on before he shut his books closed and left his room in search for food. He sneaked down the stairs and flicked on the light switch, after touching the walls to make his way to the switch. He opened the cupboard and grabbed out a few snacks: crisps, yoghurt and orange juice. He then looked to see if anyone was there and when he saw no one, he sneaked upstairs quietly.

Once he was in his room, he shut the door tight. His mother would tell him off if she caught him eating snacks now and go on about it for ages, telling him that if he was so hungry, he would have eaten dinner instead of snacks. She had always told him not to eat after 7 o’clock because he would gain weight overnight. Dylan had always thought that was a stupid reason to be told off for, so he continued to do it anyway. He munched on his snacks whilst he read some of his books on his favourite pop stars. There was a rap at his bedroom door and Dylan almost jumped out of his skin as he heard the knock. He quickly grabbed his snacks and books and shoved them in his drawer. Just as he closed the drawer, the door swung open.

It was his mother. Dylan stared at her, hoping that she wouldn’t sniff his room, finding out all the hidden snacks. She came over to his direction and for a moment, Dylan almost shouted “I haven’t got anything!” But all she did was sit on the side of his bed.

“Dylan, you should know that your father is doing things for your own good and the family,” his mother told him, so quietly that Dylan had to bend over to hear what she was saying. He heard, but said nothing in response. What could he say? He couldn’t just say it straight to his mother: I want to be a singer. Can’t you see that this isn’t for my good? This isn’t what I want.

She continued, “Sometimes, the things that benefit you in life aren’t always particularly things you want.” It was as though his mother could hear his thoughts inside his head.

“Your father is a poor man – he doesn’t ask for much – just a happy life. Why can’t you just fulfil his wish?” she asked.

“How about me mum? Have you ever considered me? I don’t ask for much either: just to be what I want to be and do what I want to. I’ve never asked you for a phone; I’ve never moaned at you two once for any money and I’ve never whined at you two for anything. I just sat back patiently and watched as the other children got things they wanted from their parents. I hoped that, doing things like this would let me choose what I could do,” Dylan told his mum, feeling his eyes go watery. He knew that he couldn’t let his mother see the tears: he hated it when people saw him cry. He wanted to blink back the tears but he knew that they would just fall if he did, so he let them sit in his eyes.

“You know what? You’re selfish and cruel. I don’t even know why your father put up with you. All these years, we’ve looked after you and this is how you repay us? Going along with you and your stupid dreams hoping to get to somewhere you’ll never reach – is that what you want?” she replied back bitterly.
“See – that is exactly what I’m talking about. You two always think I’m the cruel one here, when really it’s you two. How do you know I’ll never reach there? How do you think it’s right to call someone else’s dreams stupid?!” Dylan screamed.
“Where on earth do you think you are screaming that level? Our neighbours are sleeping, be a little quieter! Cruel? You don’t have a right to say that we’re cruel. Look at yourself – have you ever thought about what you have done for your parents? Nothing. You’ve done nothing. I know you’ll never reach there because you are selfish and selfish people don’t get very far.”
“Well, what if I do get far? What if I can do it? What will you say then?”
“The thing is you can’t get far. You won’t do it and you’ll never get there. That’s why I don’t need to say anything.”
“You sure are confident and good at destroying people’s dreams.”
“I didn’t destroy them – I showed you the reality behind your fairytale world,” she answered and then left the room.

Dylan got up and kicked the door hard; making the whole room shake and a loud bang filled the air. One of his photo frames smashed to the floor and cracked. Dylan ran over to the photo frame.

Turning the frame around slowly, Dylan shut his eyes closed and kept whispering over and over again to himself, “Please don’t let it be that one. Please not that one.” As he opened his eyes, he saw that it was that photo that the loved. It was the one where one of his favourite pop stars signed their photo. Obviously, he had never met a pop star, but one day he saw a signed photo blowing away by the wind. He sprinted after it and managed to catch it just before it flew away higher in the sky. Dylan moved the pieces at the back of the frame and took the photo out itself. He checked to see if there were any scratches or anything, but luckily, there weren’t. He breathed a sigh of relief. Even though he broke the photo frame that was hard to get, Dylan didn’t really mind. As long as he had the photo, it was fine. He held the photo against his lamp and fingered the signature. One day, he would be able to meet his idol, but for now, he was only allowed to dream.

Dylan knew that his parents would never understand – but for his mother to say it to him straight, it made his dream two times as impossible. He had always thought that mothers backed up their children – like in those books he had read. Then, what kind of mother did he have?

“Why do you always have to be like this? Why? So what if they tell me I’m cruel? So what if they tell me I have stupid dreams? Does that make me forget all about my dream and move on?” Dylan shouted at himself angrily. He was angered by how easily he could let them into his mind and control his thoughts. Even though he asked himself this question hoping that someone would reply back “no,” Dylan nodded his own head in response to his question.

From across the corridor, he could hear his parents arguing. Dylan wondered why they were arguing because if it was about how he wasn’t going to give up his dream, it didn’t make much sense to why they were arguing. If his mother and father both wanted him to forget everything and move on, they wanted the same thing didn’t they? So why were they arguing?
Dylan blocked himself out of his room, out of his house, out of his life for a moment and just breathed slowly. After a moment, he looked across to broken photo frame with the photo still inside. The photo was of Lee Jun Ki, a singer and actor that Dylan admired. Jun Ki was a normal boy in his teenage years, just like Dylan was now. He loved the usual things all teenage boys liked: sports and computers. But he was interested in performing arts a while later. However, he didn’t get into college and went to Seoul – without hardly much money. He went to there because he had a dream that he would work in the entertainment industry. He did many part time jobs to earn money whilst he was there and later, he got accepted into the entertainment industry.

The reason why Dylan admired him so much was because they had quite a lot in common: they were both normal boys who had a dream. Despite the fact that Jun Ki wanted to be an actor more, he also eventually became a singer too. But the thing Dylan was admired the most about him was that even though he had almost nothing with him when he went to Seoul, but he still went there just to get accepted into the entertainment industry. Part of Dylan wished that he could do that also but the other half of him was too scared to even step out of the house – even for just one whole day.

He stopped blocking himself out from the world and he expected his mother and father to still be arguing continuously, their voices rising higher and higher every word they spoke. But there was nothing. No sound, no voices, just silence. For a while, Dylan thought that he was still lost in his thoughts, still thinking about all the dreams and wishes. After a while, he got up and checked. He walked to his door and slowly pulled it open, as if someone was pulling onto the handle on the other side of the door.

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updated Jan 12 by Aierilyn