Tyrone wakes up, not actually dying because he was a zombie, and zombies just don't die of pneumonia.

"**@!, all my mans and them are dead and **^$i" he said, "I better go find a lazarus machine and bring them back to life."

He went over to Elmer Palmer's house to ask him about the lazarus machine.

"Yo, let me ask you about the lazarus machine!"

So Elmer Palmer began to tell Tyrone about the lazarus machine.

"So, let me begin to tell you about the lazarus machine."

Elmer Palmer told Tyrone all he knew about the lazarus machine.

"And I've just told you all I know about the lazarus machine."

Tyrone went off into the mountains, looking for the lazarus machine, saw Edward Cullen on the way.

Tyrone killed him with a mach punch.

"God damn, pussy. You ain't a real vampire! Vampires don't shine in the mother!@&*ing sun!" said Tyrone.

Tyrone found the cave where Elmer Palmer said the lazarus machine was.

Should Tyrone:

RATE THIS BRANCH!

Author guidance for This story

The lazarus machine is a machine which can bring people back from the dead. Named after Lazarus, some bloke from the Bible who died and some other bloke names Jesus brought him back from the dead.

updated Jul 13 '09 by MaxwellSpoot