Kill! Kill! Kill!!
Non-striking hand still on your nose, you raise your striking hand on Forsooth spinning him away into a half-swimming pool high mound of stinky cheese.
While you try to tell if it's Roquefort or Stilton, Avast, Hence, and Whatho, Forsooth's first cousins twice removed, latch vicious cheese stained teeth all up and down your good groining leg.
They pin you down under their hairy bodies, while Forsooth recovers from the pile of what is now so obviously Stilton.
"We'll trade you this room for your life, or we'll be forced to be really cheesed off!"