”... I love you.”

I spent so many weeks searching everywhere for even the tiniest hint about why he left, about why he…

But every time, my search ended in despair, and I was back to square one, tears. I spent so many weeks drenched the salty sweetness that I forgot how to live. I was dragged away from my joy and lost in a world suffering from an intolerable, heart-breaking loss. I lost him, and I knew there was nothing I could do to bring him back.

But maybe, just maybe… Maybe if I had known, I could’ve stopped him. Maybe if I hadn’t been so blind, he would still be here.

Everyone keeps saying it wasn’t my fault. Everyone keeps saying I had nothing to do with it. But I know, with every ounce of my being, that it was me.

Everyone keeps saying I need help.

They’re wrong. What I really needed was closure, and that’s exactly what I got.

I opened the book, his favorite, and that’s what fell out, the letter.

And as I read those, no his, last words, there were no more tears.

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