The Writing Voice

It t'was a dark and stormy night. Lightning flashed, thunder roared

"Hang on," a voice interrupted, "don't you think that's a little cliche? I think I've heard that line once before. Or twice. Yeah, now I think of it... a couple thousand times. Try something different."

I sighed, concentrated, and put fingers to keys once more. The sky was a butterscotch sunset, glowing with hints of pink lemonade and -


"BORING," The same voice in the back of my head interrupted, abrupt and exasperated. "Something more interesting."

A grimace rearranged my features into a frown. "Right," I muttered, "Something interesting..."

The spaceships landed with the force of a hurricane, shaking the ground. The door opened and out jumped the killer snails, their giant rainbow shells - 

"Giant... Killer... Snails?" I could tell the voice inside my head was doing a facepalm. I could feel it on the back of my forehead. "Maybe..." The voice suggested, "Something more realistic?"

Jack sat at his desk, on the internet. Time passed. More time passed. Jack hated his life. Jack never did anything. Society continued to disappoint him. He wanted to jump off a bridge. In fact, he thought he might just go do that now.

"If that's what you think when I say realistic, I'm phoning a therapist." 

This time I had to admit it. My Writing Voice was annoying me. "I already see a therapist," I cried. "No thanks to you." I glared defiantly at my computer screen, frowning. "What should I write, then?"  I asked the voice.

"I don't know..." It answered back, full of sarcasm, "Something people would actually want to read?"

I sighed, hoping the voice would leave me alone soon. My fingers tapped out another beat at my computer. Mr and Mrs Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very -

"Alright, alright! Enough! That's Harry Potter and you know it. No plagiarism." The voice was clearly pissed. Well, it could join the club. 

I gave a half hearted groan and threw my head upon my desk. "I'm having a nap," I told the voice. "So leave me alone."

The End

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