I knew, Deep down I should not be here. The flashing lights in sync with the movement of the mass, the smell of sweat, alcohol and damp clung to the thick air around the cramped underground hell. The base of song causing the floor to shake with a life of its own. I was not in control of my own body now more lost in the moment. Heart racing, mind hazed, my body follows the rythem as if my life depends on it
Then it all clicked into place, this is who I was. 'I was not the young woman my mother had forced me into believing I was. No I was a free spirit, I didn't want to be chained down I wanted to be free feel the wind in my hair.
But reality has an awful way of creeping up on you when you lest expect it. screaming peirced my ear drums. Turning my head to the left a group of young girls no older than myself, frantically rushing over to a group sat in a secluded corner. There face's giddy with excitment and shock seeing there Oh so loved idols in a corner as they bashfully smirk at their fans. I rolled my eyes trying to push aside the memory of when I would gush over them. Steeling my eyes as I grit my teeth feeling the lump of painful emotions trying to rise up.
"No, I wont spill another tear over you" I whisper my voice rasp and full of distaste. Pushing my self through the dance floor bodies and limbs sliding past my body. Dragging myself up the stairs, swinging open the door I dragged in a deep breathe of the cold, crisp night air. Moving to lean onto the wall bringing my foot up to rest against as I look up to the sky. My breathing ragged as I try to keep my composure