Pho trembled, his eyes clamped tightly his head pounded. A small whine escaped his lips as the dull pulse grew into the beat of a drum. Just go away, leave me be. A hand ran lightly across his face, pulling his hair out of his face, another shiver jolted up his spine. Weakly his eyes cracked but shut tightly at the bright lights around him.
"Pho...can you hear me?" a males voice asked. He nodded murmuring a yes. "Pho, I need you to open your eyes, we need to make sure you have no other issues..." Pho nodded deftly and he opened his eyes. Doctor Young stood next to him and began to check him over. First his eyes, ears, mouth, then his heartbeat and breathing. The doctor sighed, looking as though he had seen a miracle and a tragedy happen right before his eyes.
"You know, you're one lucky kid. During surgery...your heart stopped. Medically speaking you were dead for two minutes before we restarted your heart and your breathing returned." Pho looked to the doctor wide-eyed. I...I died?! He shook his head, doubts running rampant in his head. Maybe if I had died...everyone would be better off...without me. He sighed heavily, collapsing back into his bed. The pounding headache had disappeared and now only the throbbing of his leg wound scratched at his attention.
"Where's Ania, Cira and Damien?" Doctor Young looked as thought Pho had just punched him in the gut. "What? Did I say something? What happened?" his voice was raspy and hoarse as the Doctor pulled up a chair and clasped Pho's hand tightly.
"Pho...your sister, Cira, it appears that he condition was much worse than we previously thought. She's in a coma...we're not sure if she'll live." Pho flinched, his eyes widened to the size of half dollars. He shook his head violently.
"No..no, no, no! She can't be! She was fine just-"
"Pho...she's in a coma." he said sternly. Tears poured down his face.
"It's all my fault...it's all my fault," he sobbed, putting his hands to his head. "If I hadn't been such a freak, Cira would be fine. I almost killed her and now my old hatred is coming back to haunt me. Please Doctor! Please...I need to see her." Doctor Young shook his head.
"Pho, you just awoke after enduring a second surgery and being medically dead for two minutes. You need to stay here and rest, plus your leg would never support you. For you sake and the sake of your sister-"
"Don't talk about Cira like that! Don't use her for your own gains. She's good and loyal, so you leave her out of this!" Pho growled, pointing an accusatory finger at the Doctor. Doctor Young stood still, stunned to silence by the young boy. "Now, get me crutches or a wheel chair, something that will take me to my sister, NOW DAMNIT!" The doctor scurried from the room, hurriedly grabbing a set of crutches and handing them to Pho.
"She's three rooms down from your's, on the left." Swinging his legs over the side of the bed, Pho put weight on his good leg and began to move from the room and down the hall, his face was still with regret and determination. As he pushed open the door, Pho instantly noticed Damien holding his sisters hand and whispering to her. The small metallic clicks of the crutches on the floor pulled the boyfriend's attention to Pho.
"Pho...what...you, you should be resting." Pho sighed heavily, feeling tears begin to fall down his cheeks again.
"Damien, this is my sister. She's done everything for me and more...I've never said I love you to her, never said thank you for all those times she protected me. So please do not be little me by telling me to rest when the reason she is here, is because of me and my stupidity." Damien lowered his head a bit, eventually nodding.
Pho moved to his side, leaning the crutches against the wall, he sat on his sisters bed side. His eyes looked over her form, she looked like an alien; hooked to machines, wires, and tubes. Trembling, his hand grasped Cira's and squeezed it tightly.
"Hey sis," he said, choking back heavy sobs. It was his turn to be the sibling, his turn to tell his sister everything and protect her no matter what. "I died today...did you know that?" Damien's eyes jerked to meet his, Pho nodded solemnly. "I died in surgery, Doctor said I was gone for two minutes before they brought me back." He forced a smile and rubbed her hand with his thumb.
"You know Cira... in all the years of my life, I never really told you that I love you. Not like Damien loves you, but how a brother is supposed to love a sister. I never told you I appreciated your company and comfort whenever I was depressed or angry. I never told you..." he trailed off, sniffling and sobbing.
"I never told you I was sorry for what I did to you, for trying to kill you just because I'm a broken. I'm a freak...sometimes I think that if I had died; you and Ania's lives would have been perfect. No one in the hospital to worry over...I've broken not only myself but everyone around me that loved me and Cira, I'm so very sorry. I love you Cira, please..." he trailed off, moving himself further onto the bed and curling next to her. His arms wrapped around her protectively and he rested his head against hers. His voice was now just a whisper.
"Please you have to get better...you have to come out ok. Cira, Damien loves you so much more than you know and Ania needs you to teach her about guys. Guys better than me at least. Oh God....why couldn't you have just taken me, spared my sisters from this fate." His eyes clamped tightly shut. "I'd die a hundred times over for my sisters to be happy, I've ruined too much of their lives and the ones around them. Take me instead of her."
"Pho," Damien said reaching toward the young boy. "Cira's gonna pull through, she's always bee tough and strong." Pho gave him a look of utter despair and didn't let his sister go. His eyes grew heavy and soon Pho was sleeping next to his older sister, his face would occasionally spasm in pain, or a small cry would escape his lips.
Nightmares haunted him and chased him, showing him in detail everything he had done to wrong his sister. A cold sweat dripped from his brow, as he saw the evil look upon his face. Every time the memory replayed Pho tried to stop himself from pushing Cira but every time he would fail and watch her fall. The ugly truth was screaming in his face, IT'S ALL MY FAULT!