The dead king

Ghastly, figures rode astride timeless beasts, many of which might once have been beautiful stallions and mares, but now they were reduced, reborn as macabre desecrations of life, no better than their masters, Zombie Knights. These knights and their weariless steeds were hauling hordes of stolen cattle to accomplish their master's wishes. This group had traveled endlessly for days and nights in silence in order to do so. Of this group there were three zombie knights, one of the Zombies, clad with a large broken helmet, began to clear his throat heartily, as if there was a great stone in his throat.

As he reached down his throat with his undead hand it became evident there was actually a rather large stone in his throat. Upon taking it out he began to speak

"You fellas, where're we 'eaded again?"

Another Zombie , an imposing figure swathed by a dark cape answered briskly

"Master's castle"

The first zombie asked another question

"Why was t'at again?"

The second responded in due order

"Master's order"

"Wut wuz  'is orders again?

"Steal Cows"

The third zombie, this one still with a full head of blond hair started in the conversation

"Gods man, can't you remember anything?

The first Zombie retorted: "Well I'm sorry there Blondie, not all of us were lucky enough to not have died by having our skulls smashed in" removing his helmet and pointing to a large wound on the side of his head. "I may not 'ave the best a' memories, but least I didn't bleed to death by castration" pointing an accusing finger at the blond zombie.

The caped Zombie let out a chuckle as the third zombie, despite his lack of blood seemed to blush and shuffle atop his undead horse nervously. Eager to change the subject, he began talking

"Well I hope you at least remember who our master is, Zzarbestolcryx, the last great necromancer."

"Yeah, wasn't 'e also the first king" responded the first Zombie"

"Aye, King Bob, at least before he revived and renamed himself"

"I know I've only been alive, err dead, err undead for about a month or so now, but wasn't his death over four centuries ago?" asked the first Zombie

"Yes, he has been accruing power these last few hundred years so that he may eventually conquer the land"

"Yeah 'e's practically omnipotent now isn't he? I don't see why he hasn't conquered the land yet"

The blond zombie sighed, "Do you not remember last month, the master hosted a great speech with all the other zombies attending, outlining every single step of his master plan that he was setting into motion?"


"You know the one, it lasted all of five days, a couple hundred of Zombies actually died of boredom and they had to rebind their souls using necromancy, twice."

"tat one, rite 'en, why did he want us to collect cows again?"

The blond zombie let out another sigh, this one deeper than the last, before answering: " Can you not remember his explanation behind it, he was going to build a giant Zombie Cow using their body parts".

"wait, wut? why?"

"To conquer the land of course"

"why duzn't he 'ust command us to enslave everyone then, I mean we're undead, we're effect'ahvely immortal and he's practically a god with all the powers he has"

The blond Zombie somewhat annoyed and flustered at answering his comrades questions responded: "I don't know, he kept going on and on about how 'it is how it must be', "King dieing by giant cow" and irony, blah blah, I don't really know, maybe, If I were him, immortal and practically invincible you know, I'd probably spend lots of time messing around with everyone's heads out of boredom.

However the blond Zombie was interrupted, as the large caped Zombie signaled the group to a halt, they had come to the edges of a large forest.

The blond zombie started up again, "Well I hope at least you didn't drop and lose the enchanted map again" directing himself to the helmeted zombie.

"Har ar, no worries, I did drop it back when we were 'ustling the cows but I rememberd to pick it up, I can remember things w'en t'ey counts", replied the zombie, as he reached into a small sack hanging off of his shoulder and pulled out a carrot.

The End

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