How to be... EMO :D

Don't take it seriously, kiddos. I did this for school haha ;)

1. When loud music is being played, be sure to dance like you are a four year old having a temper tantrum.

2. Avoid stores like Aeropostale and American Eagle, and go to stores like Hot Topic. If you are looking for graphic t-shirts, go to either Stitches or Urban Planet. Bluenotes also has a wide selection of pointless t-shirts, which emo kids love those.

3. Never smile, and if you must, only grin for a maximum of 4 seconds.

4. Listen to your music so loud that everyone within 20 meters can hear the words.
(Please note that the words are not recognizable because of the screaming.)

5. Doodle on all of your schoolwork and binders.

6. Eyeliner: There is no such thing as too much.

7. For your footwear, either wear Chuck Taylors, DC, or a bizarre neon color of NIKE’s

8. Pretend that you dislike everyone, especially yourself.

9. A common myth is that emo kids often cut themselves, but this is entirely false. Remember, never follow through.

10. Remember: IT’S ALL ABOUT ATTENTION.

11. Wear skinny jeans that look like they could be painted on. A variety of colours is available.

12. It’s not like you need one because your pants are so tight, but put on a studded belt anyway.
(Putting on two belts in a criss-cross formation works well.)

13. Write poetry- supposedly deep and depressing, but really just a rip-off of that one song you like.

14. Secretly like Justin Bieber, but don’t tell anyone!

15. Worship Twilight.

16. Buy a guitar, but don’t learn how to play it.

17. Take a ka-jillion pictures of yourself.

18. Have an msn, myspace, twitter, facebook, bebo, tumblr, my year book, youtube, and an account on at least 2 online chat rooms.

19. Play Pokémon.

20. Join PETA, but still eat at McDonald’s.

21. Wear thumbholes in your sweaters.

22. Wear shutter shades even though they serve no purpose.

23. Hate mainstream music, but always listen to Chris Brown.

24. Worship Johnny Depp and Tim Burton.

25. Wear band shirts.

26. Color your binder with whiteout.

27. Write on your arms with pen or marker.

28. Write all over your converse shoes.

29. Say that you hate your family, but hangout with them at home.

30. Hair: side bangs!

31. Hair must always cover one of your eyes.

32. Wear scarves.

33. Think that you’re a rebel for coming to class late.

34. Quote songs and movies.

35. Mumble when you speak.

36. Wear arm socks and high stockings (usually striped).

37. Have an online other half.

38. Wear shirts that have phrases involving vampires and werewolves (the Twilight craze).

39. Read Edgar Allen Poe.

40. Sit at the back of the room, away from people during class.

41. Think Oliver Sykes and Andy Sixx are hot.

42. On the computer, T41K 1!K3 TH!$
ie. Br00t41
non-emo translation: brutal

43. On the computer, use faces like:
xD      -.-
>.>     O.o
<.<     :3
^.^      =D
T.T    <3
-.-      </3

44. Smoke.

45. Join “save the planet” organizations.

46. Don’t play sports.

47. Don’t show too much skin. You risk tanning, and emo kids MUST BE PALE.

48. Have at least 3 piercings.

49. Wear neckties… with t-shirts, regardless of gender.

50. Watch Donnie Draco.

51. Hate those preps.

52. Doodle hearts.

53. Say Rawr!

54. Buy indie records.

55. Do extremely well in Language and Visual Arts.

56. Have a poster of Jack Skellington somewhere in your room.

57. Take a lot of mirror pictures.

58. If you are male, wear female pants.

59. Dye your hair so many times that it looks dead.

60. Paint your nails black.

61. Come up with a lame internet name for yourself, with the first letters being the same.
ie: Megan Murder, Josh Jawbreaker, Scotty Skeleton, Victor Vaccination
(Please note that the above example are actual names I’ve come across.)

62. Own pet rabbits, snakes or spiders.

63. Watch the movie Alice In Wonderland a ka-jillion times.

64. Try to find an online boyfriend or girlfriend who likes in the UK.

65. “Like” every single facebook group.

66. Hate MTV.

67. Love the joker from “The Dark Knight”.

68. Hang out at the skate park, but don’t skate.

69. Hang out at the mall.

70. Love Rob Pattinson and his greasy hair and huge forehead…

71. Use large words that you don’t even know the meaning to.
(It makes you sound intellectual and deep.)

72. Cry over everything.

73. Listen to grunge, emo (of course), screamo, and acoustic music.

74. Go to the hospital a lot and share your experiences.

75. Listen to Michael Jackson.

76. Wear hoodies.

77. Become an expert at glaring.

78. Extend your eye makeup past your eyes.

79. Talk about kittens, cupcakes and cookies.

80. Don’t eat at school.

81. Don’t conform!!!!!!!!

82. Read a lot of books.

83. Get a Jack Skellington tattoo.

84. Want to marry a vampire.

 

The End

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