Housekeeping - So WrongMature

Sophia brings vodka. That can only mean bad things, right?

Sophia had done it now. She had introduced vodka to them both. She had decided to pay Gru a visit, mostly to see Rach and to watch them have their daily brawl, but regardless. She was there. And she had brought alcohol. It had only been half an hour since she had arrived and already half of the bottle had been consumed by Gru alone.

"Ooooh. Nice!" He smacked his lips as he carelessly flung his arms around, his now empty glass in hand. "Good stuff."

Sophia rolled her eyes. "You'd think that at his age he could at least hold his drink. Right Rach?" She looked over, only to find Rachel in a similar state.

"Mmmmhee, whatever you say! He's just a siiiillly baldylocks."

"What the..." Sophia couldn't help but stifle a giggle, as Gru's head snapped around sharply and his eyes attempted to focus on Rachel. His evil glare failed, looking more like he had a bad case of trapped gas.

"HEY HEY EYEYEY!" He yelled, "I'm not THAT bald."

"Uhhhhm." Rachel leaned in and squinted at his head. "Yeah. No seriously. Yeah you are."

"Am not!"

"ARE TOOOOO!" She paused and lifted her finger to her lips. "Too shhhhhh."

"SHHHHH yourself." Gru stuck out his tongue, although it took him a few seconds to remember how to actually do it.

"Don't point that thing at me, mister. I'll bite it off!" Her finger slid from her mouth and wiggled in his direction. "I m-mean it. Yeah. Totally mean it, not lyin'!"

"You two are SO wasted." Sophia grinned at them both like the Cheshire cat and sat in the Rhino seat to watch from afar. It seemed as if a fight was inevitable and she'd be damned if she was going to get caught up in it.

"SO!?" They both yelled in unison, before swirling round to each other and pointing. "JINX!"

"Wow, how old are you supposed to be? 16?" Sophia narrowed her eyes, her grin turning to a sly smirk. She loved teasing. Especially Gru. He was such an easy target.

"I'M OLDER THAN YOU, sh... Sh... SHATTAP!" Gru wobbled a little as he sat down slowly on the rug. If he didn't, he'd have surely fallen face first.

"Yeah. Shhhhh you big poopface!" Rachel also joined Gru for fear of faceplanting the carpet. "Like you know what's... Like... Up and stuff. Yeah?"

"Yeah! You tell her." Gru waggled his eyebrows and downed one final shot of vodka, the glass dropping from his fingers and rolling across the carpet.

"Awful, awful insults guys. Really. I expected better." She hitched her glasses up on her nose and snickered quietly, as she watched the glass roll under the sofa.

"Quiet. Growd ups are talkink." Gru hissed in Sophia's direction, but ended up hissing at the lamp instead.

"Could have fooled me..."

"You're just jealous 'cause... Like... You're not as, er... Funky as us. Or, like..." Rachel hiccuped mid-sentence, blinked and went back to her shouting. "Like, because we live in this huuuuge house."

Gru stared at Rachel as she hurled petty insults. A small smile slowly spread across his face.

"Yeah. That MUST be it." Sophia rolled her eyes and folded her arms.

"Uh-huh. Thought so." Rachel turned back to Gru, albeit very wobbly, and noticed his silly grin. "Whhhaaaaat?"

"Maybe it's the vodka talking..." Gru's accent was even thicker than normal when he was drunk and this occasion was no different. "Buuuuut... The light on your hair is really making the red... Ness... Jump out."

"Whaaaat?" She blinked to clear her vision.

"And your eyes are sparkling!"
"What? Nawwww." She swatted her hand in his direction, a faint flush of pink tinting her cheeks.

"No, s-s-seriously. Yes!" He swayed and pointed, accidentally catching his fingertip against her nose.

"Eeeee hee!" Her hand shot up and rubbed at it, as she turned slightly away with embarrassment. "Stooooop."

His hand reached out again and took hold of her arm. Yanking her forward, he grinned widely. The alcohol was causing his skin to glow bright red and from her close proximity and Rachel could feel a slight heat radiating from him. "Why don't you maaake meeee." He chirped, waggling his head from side to side playfully.

"Don't teeempt meee." She mimicked his voice, leaning in even further to tease.

By this point, Sophia was sat bolt upright in her seat. "What? WHAT!? What is THIS!? Where is the fighting!?"

Gru and Rachel ignored her completely as they continued their odd and somewhat out of character flirting. "Come here often?" Gru, yet again, wiggled his brows.

"Here? In your front room? On your rug?" She pretended to think for a moment, before looking back down at him again, her eyes glazed over from the effects of the vodka. "No. But, I will if you wa... Waaaait... Are you flirty flirtying?"

"What? No!" He swatted both his hands in the air. "No... What? You... You're craaazy. No... Flirting? Me?" He paused and tried to focus on her face, his own glowing even redder. Having her in such close proximity was unusual. Sure, he had been close to her before when wrestling, but never like this. It was making him feel strange. In fact, there was an odd thumping in his chest. An odd thumping that was making his brain say funny things to him. Telling him to do things... Things he would never dare do. He shook himself free from his inner monologue and focused once again on her face.

"What?" She raised a brow.

There was no more conversation, as Gru almost yanked her forwards, angled his head and pressed his lips hard against hers.

Sophia nearly fell from her seat in both fright and shock. "AHHHHH!"

Her cries were ignored once again. They were far too busy.

Rachel stared at him for a few moments, wondering if she was imagining it until finally curling her arms around his neck and reciprocating. Their lips danced against each others as their fingers lightly caressed clothing.

Gru was screaming inwardly, but something about his current state urged him to be more daring. His tongue forced its way into her mouth, his hands exploring further downwards from her shoulders.

Rachel let out a small squeak as she felt his tongue slip inside her mouth and his hand slip slowly under the fabric of her sweater. His fingers brushed the skin of her back in such a way it caused her to shiver, her skin prickling with goosebumps.

Sophia's jaw had dropped as she watched the pair. She didn't know if she should keep watching, or go and throw up in the nearest sink. To her it was one of those sights that was so gross, but simply can't tear yourself away from.

Rachel lightly pushed him away and slid her hands down his chest, the material of his sweater causing tingles in her fingertips. Once they found the edge of the sweater, she slipped them up, stroking up and down his bare skin.

Gru broke the kiss and let out a small whimper, his breath hot against her face. He had never been touched in such a way and it was all so overwhelming. Her hands wasted no time in reaching even further into the hem of his trousers, teasing him by giving them small tugs. She nipped at his lips, as his breathing became laboured. It was just too cute... She was already driving him into a frenzy and she had only tickled his chest lightly. She wondered how he would react if she... A devilish grin spread across her face, as her hand slipped to his zipper and slowly unzipped it.

"OK! I'm OUTTA HERE!" Sophia flailed wildly, running for the nearest exit. There was no way she was sticking around to see that.

Gru just sat there and stared into her face as she slowly slid her hand past the open zipper and rubbed against his underwear inside. He let out a yelp, his face flushing even redder, as he grasped hold of her shoulders to steady himself from topping forwards into a heap. "If... If you..."

She raised her head, but continued to stroke him. "Hm? Yes?"

He didn't reply, he only launched his face in towards her neck, his own hands now reaching for the hem of her sweater, lifting it upwards over her head. He tossed it to one side and hastily took hold of the button on her jeans, yanking it open and ferociously tugging off the item of clothing.

"Woo-oo, Gru. You monster." She winked, her own face as red as his from the sudden intimacy the two were sharing.

"Shut up." He tossed the jeans on top of the sweater and once again launched at her neck running his tongue up it lustfully. He coupled the licks with sharp bites, smiling to himself as red marks appeared on her pale skin. "Be... u... ti...f..." He slowly pushed her backwards, his words drowned out by the tender kiss he planted on the side of her face.

"Th-this feels s-so wrong, but... Daaaaamn, Gru!" She smiled to herself as her skin tingled from the attention he was giving her. His hands traced every inch of her and explored the next item of clothing to remove. But, before he could begin, she had already reached down and had started to yank on his sweater, his head lost in a mound of fabric folds. "Mmmph nnn." It finally came off and she, just as he did, tossed it carelessly to one side without a second thought.

"Troooouserrrs." She pointed at them and grinned, receiving a knowing nod from Gru, who was now so ready for it, he looked as if he was about to jump her then and there. He yanked off his shoes, his socks and then his trousers, all of them ending up in different corners of the room.

Rachel grinned down at his smiley underwear. Those little faces had made her smile every time she had washed them while working and now they were making her smile for an entirely different reason. She once again reached down, but this time into them, her fingers connecting with bare flesh once more, but this time in a more intimate location. Gru bit down on his lip and moaned loudly, his forehead slowly dampening with sweat as her ministrations caused waves of pleasure to surge through his entire body.

"You like that?"

He nodded, his breathing irregular and rapid. But, alas, he was unable to respond to her question properly. Instead, she would have to make do with another lustful moan.

"Mm-hmm... I knew you would." She gripped tighter, while the other hand worked at trying to remove the underwear, which were now getting in the way.

Gru was reeling. He had never felt anything like it before. He slowly leaned back and allowed her to take control. He suddenly felt out of his depth and he was terrified. He could feel the underwear slip down and past his ankles, but for some reason he just daren't look down. He didn't understand why, but he was suffering from embarrassment. Rachel had noticed and smiled to herself. She knew she would have to snap him out of it, so decided to take matters into her own hands.

"Hey!"

Gru's head instinctively shot up to look her in the face, but got distracted at the sight of his own lower region. His eyes widened as she suddenly lowered and slowly wrapped her lips around him, her tongue brushing up and down ever so lightly that is was almost too much to bear.

His eyes rolled back as he collapsed backwards onto the carpet again, outcries of pleasure spilling from his lips. "Oh... Oh f... Don't... Just don't... Stop. Please!"

She was satisfied with her victory and did as he requested. She did not stop, in fact, she upped her pace a little more.

His fingers gripped hold of the rug tightly, his knuckles white from the force of his grip. "Ohhhh holy gooods!"

Suddenly, Rachel stopped and Gru's head shot up. He gave her a look like a deer caught in headlights, the only sound coming from his mouth an odd sort of gulp. He watched as she maneuvered herself over him, her legs either side of his hips.

"That, dear Gru, was only the beginning..."

The End

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