Two Theories & One Plan

Well, here we are. Again. At the start of a new chapter.

Yes, and a fine blank page it is. But not for long. What to do, what to do.

We could just stop now. Perhaps the readers would enjoy a blank page for a change.

Are you trying to make a joke?

. . .

I hope so. How about we do the next best thing? Let us give narrating a rest. Just for this chapter.

Are you sure? I mean, the story won't go anywhere - for an entire chapter!

Well, we can kick it into high gear next chapter. Okay? Come sit.


. . .

What is on your mind?

I've got a theory. No, wait. Make that two.

Oh, and what might they be?

Well, they are more like... hypotheses.

I'm listening.

Here goes.

I suspect that, thus far, there are two distinct authors, alternating. Analyze the last few chapters, you'll see it. One lets you use contractions as much as me. The other only let you use them once, as a slip up, to make a joke. The first is willing to capitalize entire words for emphasis, while the other prefers to toggle italicization.

Neat. Anything else?

Well, remember when we lost track of the characters, and they had moved on without us?

Yes, though I would like to forget that.

However, I brought George into creation of my own volition. I said he was there, and thus he was.


Well, that means we have a rather inconsistent level of control over the story, as narrators. Perhaps it was because we forgot about the characters at that time.

Wait, so... what we did with Edward, we can do again?

Yeah, I think we pretty much hold the puppet strings of everything. We're not just narrators - we're in control of the writing too. Mind you, we answer to the co-authors.

Oh, yeah. The cue cards. Do not, dare, remind me.

You can't use contractions in this chapter, can you?

No, I cannot. I tried, just now. Consciously attempted to self-narrate "I can't", and it wouldn't contract. The current writer's definitely reluctant with them.

That offers proof for one theory. How about testing the second one?

Well, what else can we do? We are in somewhat of a jam here. I mean, despite creating Edward ourselves... he has a mind of his own. Says things he should not say. Knows things he should not know.

All right. I have a plan.

A plan?

Yeah. You know the old cliché phrase: desperate times call for desperate measures.

. . .

First, we need to stop using so many ellipses. Then, we're going to test our control.


Well, think of some plot devices, quick. We're gonna have to do something about Edward, before he opens a direct line of communication between us and the other characters. George seems to be an antagonist, and that won't make a good parley.

Death is already a theme, is it not? Let us go with that, for starters.

The End

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