"Holyshitholyshitholyshit. Are you alright? Holyshitholyshitholyshit. Are you okay?" My heart is racing, my blood is rushing, and my breath is getting harder and harder by the second. It's a panic attack.
"I'm fine, what the hell happened? Stopped yelling!" Apparently I'm shouting, and I can feel my voice straining but I don't care. I thought something in the presence of other people.
"Look me in the eyes. Are you hearing voices? Are things swirling? Do you see monsters? Alexis! Do. You. See. Monsters?!" I'm holding her face in my hands and forcing her to look at me.
"Jesus christ, just one trying to squish my face." She pushes me away. "What's the matter with you, and what the hell just happened? Did you throw that?"
She's okay. She's okay. She's... okay? This doesn't make any sense. No sense at all.
"I just... and you were... and it... he... wait... Nothing is different? You aren't hearing a voice in your head to hurt things?"
"No one other than the one to smack you so you calm the piss down. Relax, I'm fine now. Just tell me. What. Happened?" Dear god what a relief. I'd ran the risk of a heart attack a bit ago, but now my breathing is smoothing out.
"No, I'm not strong enough to move that, come on. It just... bounced?" Weak lie, but it was the best I could think of in this panic.
The cashier had started running when he heard the crash, now out of breath he asks, "Are you folks alright? What happened? I'm so very sorry. So sorry. Are you alright? What happened? I'm sorry. What happened?" He's a broken record player. I ease my hand thats not massaging my chest up to signal him to shut up.
"We're fine. She hit the shelf with her chair and it toppled over."
"Oh thank the stars you guys are alright. The coffees are on the house. Come on up to the bar while I get this mess cleaned up."
We walk up to the bar, grab the drinks, and look at one another. In unison we start laughing. She is fine. Nothing happened to her, and we are all safe and sound.
Yet I'm a tad curious about whats different here. I thought I knew what the limitations were. Thought I knew how everything works, and how it worked with my father.
Maybe it's not being near it, but actually seeing it?
I don't know. I need another coffee.