The light shines down on my fork, radiance reflecting on its greased surface. As beautiful melody continues to fill the air, I gradually take bites out of my food, savoring each bite with guilty mirth. Eventually, I come to eat about a quarter of the whole meatloaf. This would have been so much better if the meal was made with pure hands. Unfortunately, they had to be made by murderers and oppressors. No matter how lovely the food tastes, its true bitterness cannot mask itself from my tongue.
"The minister sends his apologies to you, Mr. Clarin." Lea says in a soft voice.
"He says that he would simply be delighted to join you in dinner tonight, but it seems that he has quite a few chores, being the minister. He says that he can't wait to finally meet you in person."
I think about this so-called minister. I wonder what he's like, I ask myself. I begin to picture a gruff man with hairy arms and facial hair. He's probably some kind of fat pervert that laughs maniacally to his terrible jokes. Ah, yes... I can see him laughing as he paints his bare hands with the blood of the innocent.
Growing ever more curious, I ask the maiden Lea who's standing behind me.
"So... This minister... What's he like?" I ask, not looking away from my meal.
"Well..." Lea responds.
"The minister is a kind, gentle individual... He's very sweet, and caring for all his subjects. Even though he's in such a high position, he's not afraid to come down to our level."
"Heh... Of course, you'd say that." I scoffed at her.
"He pays you to make him look good. Your minister ordered men to torture, execute, and murder my people! What do you mean he's a 'sweet' and 'caring' person!? He's a savage brute, just like the rest of you!"
The beautiful melody comes to a sudden halt. The air grows cold as silence takes over.
I exploded in anger as I shift from my seat to a standing position. Slamming my fork down, I glance over to Lea, who's keeping a detached face, and a straight posture.
"If he's such a sweet and caring as you say he is, The least he could do is leave me alone. I'd rather be out and suffering, than mingling with demons like you!"
"Psh, you hypocrites makes me sick to my stomach." I harshly say as I walk out in rage.
As I take my steps to the outside of the room, I feel the cold stares of the speechless people watching me after my little fit. It felt uncomfortable and awkward.
But then, I remembered: I'm not the one who's done wrong here. In fact, that fit of rage was nothing but a mere glimpse of my burning hatred for them. they deserve more than just that. If I were to have it my way, I'd take all of their lives and crush them in the palm of my hands.
...But then again what good would that do? Would it bring back anyone from the dead? No, it wouldn't. I would just be spreading the violence further. Then I would be no less than what they are; savage brutes.
Taking deep breaths as I walk fast across the corridors, I set my eyes quickly on getting to my room, passing doors and staff members along the way. I don't feel like talking with anyone right now. There are no "people" here. There are only monsters.
After I come down the stairs, I eventually reach the front door of my room. With both of my weak hands, I push the door open by the handles. The room welcomes me once more. Scanning the room quickly, I notice a lamp decorated with pink flowers. Creeping closer to it, I lit it up and watch as it illuminates the room with a tender blend of orange and pink. A few other lamps of its kind seem to line the room on the other side. Turning to them, I went ahead and lit the others up as well.
Somehow, in this lair of beasts, A feeling of warmth and comfort makes its way to my heart. What could it be? I close my eyes as I try to think of the reason to this little surprise.
Ah, I remember now, That one winter's night, when Chris invited Terell and I to his house. We were laughing and exchanging stories, and talking about things we were to find out a little sooner.
"Ok, seriously though, I've been kinda wonderin, ya know..." Chris stars quietly.
"Wondering? about what?" Terell asks as his hazel eyes focuses on Chris.
"Well ya know... Girls... What do you think about them...?"
Chris avoids eye contact as he shyly tucks his head into his scarf.
A moment of silence passes as everyone thinks of what to say.
"Hmmm... Well, they're alright I guess. You know, they're into weird stuff." I say as I look up the ceiling.
"Yeah, but would you kiss one...?" Chris asks me.
The fireplace crackles as its fire continue to warm us. The bright orange light casts long shadows behind us, almost as if projecting our future images as we sit in front of it. I look down to Chris, who's obviously eager to hear my answer. But more importantly, Terell was staring at me wide eyed, looking almost twice as interested as Chris was.
I feel my face redden. Panicking, I deflect the question to Terell.
"U-Uh, what about you Terell? Would you k-kiss a girl?" I stutter as I ask him the question.
Surprised, Terell suddenly looks down in embarrassment, our attention now towards him.
"Uhm... Well... Well you see I..." Terell struggles to find the words to say.
"I... Don't like girls..."
Chris and I both take a glance at each other, agreeing that we're confused with his answer.
"What... What do you mean?" Chris asks.
"Well you see... I like boys... not girls..." Terell says as he ducks his head between his knees hiding his embarrassment.
"OH..! D-Don't worry! I mean... I uh... i kinda like boys too, y'know!" Chris says as he tries to reassure Terell.
"Really...?" Terell peeks out from behind his knees.
"Y-Yeah! I mean... sure, they gotta look cute and stuff.... But it's the same thing! Uh.... Uh.. Kinda..." Chris wearily answers.
Terell turns his eyes at me. I can feel his stare pierce through my soul as if tearing through my curtain of deceit.
"What about you, Raffy...?" He asks me in the most angelic and adorable voice.
"UH... WELL.. Well I... I mean, I-I like girls!" I shout as I panic a little.
"Oh...." Terell says in an almost disappointed voice.
Seeing him with his big sad eyes, I shift awkwardly and say:
"B-But! I'm like Chris too! I can like boys too!"
Terell pulls his head back up, his face lightened up a little.
"R-Really? What.... What kind of boys do you like?" He asks me as I stare him directly in his eyes.
I open my eyes once more. The soft bed embraces me as I lay my back on it. With a crack of smile on my face, I softly whisper to myself.
"Like you, Terell... Ones that are sweet and innocent like you..."