“Are you happy?” you ask, curling the blanket around your shoulders. You are smiling as a curl from your hair drops out of its bun, and you smile because I think you know that I am secretly, that my tears are relief or fear or maybe both. I nod, push my frown into a grin, fat raindrop tears dripping down my cheeks. “It’s perfect now.” Toby licks my toes and I suppress a giggle. I bat him away playfully. Your eyes sparkle in the moonlight and I think, I always thought they were blue,as she asks, “Then why are you crying?” I shake my head I don’t know, laughing vulnerably through tears that seem to teach me more now that I have learnt to smile through them. “Because I just settled in here,” I admit, “and I love you so much already. And now I’m leaving and I never even found out your favourite colour.” “Indigo,” you whisper and I wonder in the moment if you are saying that because the sky is shifting from evening to twilight. I watch your eyes, finally, looking up from the spiky silhouettes of grass. I know that’s you're telling the truth, that it has always been your favourite colour. “Well then,” I say, “I guess it’s settled.” You smiles at me, honest and pure and true, and I know that no matter how far away I’m going that you, along with everybody else I love, will always be here when I get back. And in my soul you’ll all be there for me all the times in between, if I’ve got anything more to say about it.