It's happening again. That feeling where I lose control and forget who I am. I am trying very hard to exist right now, because I think simply being might be enough.
I want to see you. No, I need to see you. This longing goes so far beyond lust, so much deeper than that. When I'm laying in the dark I can remember how your skin felt against mine. And it brings me peace, but it also tears me apart. I'm just so lost.
Today I am going to meet the doctor for the first time. Supposedly he's the one with all the answers. With the ticket out of here, back into the real world. In this place, memories swirl in the white walls, until I'm trapped in that place I promised you I wouldn't go to anymore. Eventually I am going to be free. I'm not sure of what. Just...free.
And then I'll come home, to you. Everything will be right. I wont be so weak, and you wont be so scared. Things will never fall apart again.