When I wake up, I'm instantly plied with breakfast, Citalopram and the promise of methadone later on. I don't eat the breakfast, and refuse for about an hour to take the pill. Campbell hears about it and comes down to talk me into taking it. Eventually I just take it to make him shut up and leave me alone.
Just as the nurse tightens a belt around my arm for my methadone injection, someone from school is walked in, her hair covering her face. I can't remember what her name is, but I've seen her around. I frown and sit up.
"Who's that?" I ask. The nurse ignores me and tells me to lie back down, but I don't listen. The girl looks around and glances at me. I frown. Who is she? Even as I lie down and feel the needle slide into my vein, I'm wondering what her name is. I can't remember.
About three hours later, I'm sitting in bed, eating some shitty sandwich they gave me and watching Shrek the millionth, I remember her name.
"Erin!" I kind of shout at myself, slapping my forehead. How could I forget? I attract a couple of curious looks and the nurses attention.
"Is everything okay, Damien?" she asks. I look down the ward at Erin. She shoots me a glare that I almost miss, and rolls over, facing away from me. O...kay. What did I do to her? I glance back at the nurse and shrug.
"As okay as everything can be when you're drugged up," I mutter under my breath, fixing my eyes back on the green blobs on the TV screen that's been wheeled over to the end of my bed. She doesn't hear me and waits around a little longer for me to answer, but I'm fixated by the film again. Shaking her head, the nurse walks away again.
I don't know why I never went through with this methadone thing before. Campbell persuaded me to sign up for it a couple months ago, but I never had that first dose. It's possibly the most gorgeous drug in the world. Just like heroin, but without the rush, and I can still do stuff I want to. If I was on heroin right now, I wouldn't even be thinking about maybe saying hi to Erin, I'd be maybe shooting up another, smaller dose, or asleep. Methadone still feels warm and fuzzy and comfortable, but I can do things, if I want to, and I'm not sleepy yet.
Campbell says that I can feel this good anywhere between six to twenty four hours after the shot. It just depends on the dose and on my reaction to it.
I hum to myself, wondering if I should go say hi to Erin or not. I mean, she did just glare at me.
I think it comes as a surprise to both of us when I sit down next to her bed, if I'm honest. She looks at me like I'm something from outer space, or maybe from Shrek, and I look down at the chair, wondering what eventually prompted me to come over.
"Hi," I say, smiling, "you are Erin, right?" She doesn't say anything. Her face drops into a scowl, and she rolls over again so she can't see me. "What've I done?"
"My name isn't Erin," she says.
"But I've seen you in school. I remember now - people there call you Er-"
"Well they're wrong, aren't they," she cuts me off angrily and I blink, confused. I'm quiet as I try to work that one out in my head, but apparently my brain doesn't want to work with me on that one today.
"Okay..." I mutter, and she looks over her shoulder at me.
"You're still here?" I give her a confused look and she settles back down, looking away from me again. "Just fuck off, Damien." Well if she's allowed to know who I am, and I'm not allowed to know who she is... That's just not fair.
"What should I call you then? I mean, if Erin isn't your name..." she's quiet. I wait. After a couple of minutes, she shifts onto her back and glances at me.
"Lucas." Wait, Lucas? Isn't that a boy's name?
"...Lucas?" at the look of utter confusion on my face, she scowls again.
"Deal with it, faggot," she snaps. Okay, I'll let that one slide.