April 22, 2008, three days after my mom died, and also my birthday.
I sat there on my bed, emotionless. I had nothing else to do, I was numb. I kept asking god what I had done for him to take away my mama. I was 17, without a mother. It had been a rough three days. My mom had always had something planned for my birthday, and here I sat on this Tuesday evening with nothing to do.
I was sick of everyone's pity parties for me. I just wanted everyone to leave me alone. My daddy had just simply wished me a happy birthday, and nothing more. What was he supposed to do with a 17 year old daughter? He didn't even know. I'm not even sure that he had a gift for me. But I didn't want one; the only thing I wanted was to have my mama back.
As I drifted off in my thoughts, I heard a knock on the door, and it opened. I looked over to see my daddy. He gave me the best smile he could. Three days ago was the first time I had ever seen my daddy cry, and he was trying to hold back and stay strong for me, but that's pretty tough to do.
"You wanna come down stairs; I have a surprise for you."
We walked downstairs together, and when we had made it to the kitchen, I saw Connor, Curt, and Lisa, Connor's mom. They were all standing behind the window and there was a lit birthday cake in the center of the table. Lisa came and gave me a hug as I looked at the sight in the kitchen. Curt and Connor stepped out from behind the window, and I saw a brand new Dodge Ram sitting in the parking lot. I turned to my daddy who had the keys in his hand. I ran up and hugged him. I felt tears welling up in my eyes as Connor a came over to me.
"Happy Birthday Misty." Connor said giving me a hug.
I couldn't stop crying. They started singing "Happy Birthday" to me and my crying went to a new high. I could barley breath. I ran to the bathroom after blowing out my candles. I ran cold water, and put my face underneath it to try and calm myself down. I turned off the water and slowly slid to the ground. I sat there for a few minutes when I heard someone knock on my door. I stood up and opened the door, it was Lisa.
"You okay kiddo?" She asked coming into the bathroom door.
"As good as I will be." I said putting on the best smile I could.
"Well, listen. If you need anything don't hesitate to come to me and ask. Tampons, birth control, condoms, anything. Okay?" She said holding out here arms for a hug.
I accepted and gave her a tight squeeze. I walked back out to the kitchen with her to join they guys. They were all standing around, not knowing what to do or say. I put on another fake smile looking at the three of them.
"Thanks guys, for everything."
They all nodded. We all went to the living room, and sat down. Connor went to the love seat, and made room for me. I sat down beside him, and put my headed on his chest. I curled up closer, basically laying on him and he just sat there with his tight grip around me. He wasn't gonna let go, and I didn't want him too. Our parents just looked at us, with love in their eyes. But I just wanted to hold onto Connor and never let go. Connor started running his hand back and forth on my back, and it helped even more to keep me calm and feel safe.
After awhile Connor tapped my back and I looked up at him. He smiled. That smile could comfort anyone.
"Come with me, I have a surprise for you." He said nodding to the door.
"Okay." I accepted as I pulled away from him.
"We're going to the barn, is it ok if we spent the night up there?" Connor asked looking at both of our parents."
"It's ok with us and long as Jake don't care." Curt replied looking towards my dad who nodded. "But, I just want to talk to Misty real quick; she'll meet you outside son." Curt finished taking me by the arm and pushing me towards the dining room.
"What is it?" I asked
"I just want to let you know, that you're like a daughter to me, and I would do anything if you needed it. Your dad is trying to stay strong, but at anytime you need someone, the door is always open." He said opening his arms up.
"Thanks Curt." I said giving him a huge hug.
"And I mean it missy." He said jokingly. "Now get going!" He said pointing to the door.
I gave him my best smile and walked back to the living room giving my dad a good night hug and kiss then headed back to the door. I said goodbye to Lisa, and Curt and headed out the door to find Connor. He had my keys to the truck, and beeped the horn. I walked over to the truck and jumped in. He started up the truck and grabbed my hand. We drove over to his farm and parked the truck outside the barn.
"You're putting a blindfold on."
"Fine…" I said regrettingly
He put a blindfold over my eyes, and grabbed my hands tighter. We slowly made our way through the old barn, as I held on anxiously to his hands guiding me. When we came to the ladder he walked behind me, and guided me by placing his hands on my hips, sending chills through my body.
"Last rung. Step up the flat." He guided.
When I heard him make it to the top, he wrapped his arms around my waist and help on to me tight. I felt safe, like nothing could hurt me.
"Okay, take off the blindfold." He said with suspense in his voice.
I opened my eyes to see the loft completely decorated. Roses everywhere, rose petals covering the floor, a pile of hay bales covered in a soft blanket with heart shaped pillows on it, and then in the center, a small silver box. I looked back at Connor in awe, not knowing how to react, or say. I just hugged him, and didn't want to let go.
"Go open it." He suggested nodding towards the small silver box in the middle of hay bed.
I walked over it cautiously, and sat down beside it. Connor came and leaned up against the wall and watched with anticipation. I picked it up and pulled off the baby blue bow. I slowly pulled it open with my eyes shut. Once I had it open, I opened up my eyes, and stared down at the tiny box. It was a sterling silver cow with a tiny diamond eye. I looked directly at Connor still not knowing what to say.
He just looked at me with his million dollar smile and said, "Look on the back."
I flipped it over to see a little message:
Misty, I love you more than anything. I know this is a hard time for you but, my love will never die. I'm always here. Stay strong Cowgirl!
I put my hand over my mouth, and tear began to run down my face. I stood up and hugged Connor tighter than I every have before.
"Turn around; I'll put it on you."
I turned and lifted the hair from my neck, feeling the rough skin of his fingers seconds later. The necklace fell into place in the hollow of my throat and I went to let down my hair but was stopped by his hand. He leaned in and kissed the back of my neck softly, blowing out hot air as he did and then licking gently with his tongue.
"Connor." I said with a shiver as I turned to face him.
"Let me kiss you Misty," His voice was husky as he leaned in a little ways. All I could do was stare into his hazel eyes as he leaned in even closer.
His lips were rough on mine which contrasted with the soft movement he was using. Connor's hands found there way to my waist as I let mine wrap around his neck, efficiently pulling us closer together.
His tongue ran across my lips in a way that asked for permission to enter, and when I parted mine it was like permission granted light. (AN…like in those cheesy spy movies that they type in the code and the little box goes 'permission granted' XD)
Connor pulled back and stared into my eyes, "You're beautiful."
"You aren't too bad yourself cowboy," I said with a wink. He just laughed and leaned in to kiss me again.
Our second kiss was hotter than the first and he just shoved his tongue into my mouth instead of asking for permission. Our hands roamed over each others bodies as we continued kissing. He put his hands under my ass and picked me up, so I wrapped my legs around his waist.
His arousal was evident against my core before he laid me down on the blanket he had laid out earlier. He crawled on top of me and attacked my neck with kisses making me laugh and moan at the same time.
Connor's hands trailed up under my shirt and across my stomach. I felt his fingers playing with my belly button ring that I had gotten last summer and it was oddly sensual.
"Lean up," Connor whispered in a husky voice as he tugged on my shirt. I leaned up and he pulled the shirt the whole way over my head.
My hands drifted to the bottom of his shirt and I tugged it up before he pushed me back down. He pulled his shirt the rest of the way off, flexing his muscles in a tempting way and revealing his six pack to me.
Things progressed quickly after that as we teased each other and tested the waters. Before I knew it we were laying there practically naked, me in only my thong and him just wearing his boxers.
"Are you sure Misty?" Connor asked, his voice laced with desire as he stared down at me.
"I'm positive," I replied giving him a smile and letting my fingers trail over his face in a gentle caress.
He nodded and I felt his hands move under the skinny side straps of my thong. "Hips up." I lifted my pelvis off the blanket and felt him slide the thong down my legs.
"You are amazing," He said in a breathless whisper as he looked over my naked body. My whole body felt hot and I could tell I was blushing really bad.
"Boxers off," I replied tugging on the elastic waist band.
He helped me pull them down and off before he leaned in to kiss me softly on the lips.
"You're ready," He said as lined himself up at my entrance and slowly pushed in. He paused before he reached my barrier and looked at me one more time.
"Do it," I whispered as I stared up at him lovingly.
"I love you," Connor said against my lips before claiming them in a kiss and pushing the rest of the way in.
I cried out in pain as my body tried to adjust to the size of him.
"I'm sorry," He said as he kissed away the tears that were in the corner of my eyes. His fingers ran over my body lightly as he waited for me to give him the okay.
"Start moving," My voice was soft as I leaned up and captured his mouth in a kiss.
He thrust into me slowly at first but as our moans got louder his thrusting increased in speed and took moments before I fell over the edge. With one final thrust he came as well and his body collapsed on top of mine.
We layed there together, in the loft, holding each other. I snuggled closer to him, putting my head on his chest. Connor reached over and grabbed my necklaces, and ran his fingers over it. I looked up at him with a smile.
"Thank you, so much." I said hugging him tight.
"Why?" He asked looking down at me puzzled.
"Because, you made my birthday worth while."
"I love you."
"I love you too."
We finished our night laying in each others arms, and that's where we stayed until we woke up the next morning. When I woke up Connor was running his fingers through my hair, with a smile. I rolled over to him with a kiss. Then we heard the barn door open, and we bolted up. I ran for my clothes and we both rushed to put them on.
"Connor, Misty? Where are you two?" Curt called.
"Up here dad." Connor called back as he pulled on his shirt he came over and kissed me one more time. "I love you so so much!"