I stared at her. "What?"
"Look, I don't like it either, but orders are orders. Until we find out what you're doing and why, I'm on you like white on rice."
"Well," I said, "Does this mean I get to go about my normal life? And you just follow me around?"
"Fortunately, no." She said standing up.
"Fortune would depend on your perspective." I said morosely.
"Look, you were able to talk Adam into suicide which means you clearly know more about him than any of us." She said.
"I didn't even know his name..." I said half-heartedly. I mean, I had accidentally guessed it, but it's not like I knew his name was Adam.
"Argh, hopefully I can get you to drop the playing dumb act at some point, but for now, it doesn't matter. You're going to this meeting spot."
"Yeah, Adam was getting new orders today, important information and he was going to hand it over to me." She said. "His contacts never knew who he was, but they used code phrases, but we've got little else to go on."
"So, here's what's going to happen. You're going to the meeting point in his place."
"Oh God." I said.
"They figure you either prove you're some super spy by pulling off this meeting, or you die and prove yourself innocent. It's a win/win."
"Except for the dying." I reminded her.
"Except for the dying."
"This sounds kind of like Salem Witch Trials thing..." I said carefully.
"What, no, not at all like that. That would be inhumane."
"Well, I mean, it was like 'we're going to throw you off this cliff and if you fly you're a witch and we'll totally kill you, but if you plummet to your death then, bonus points you die a good christian!' It sounds very similar to me."
"But this is about National Security."
"Trust me, it's not. Adam was incompetent. He couldn't stab a kitten. Whoever he is working for is just some crazy backwards commune that's drinking way too much of the Kool Aid."
"Then it shouldn't be too hard to hop into the meeting." She said grabbing the files off the table. She turned off the TV as Adam's blood sprayed across the screen and landed on Past Me.
I was as good as dead.
I was tied down on Epic tracks with an Epic train heading right for me. My white knight, Monotony, was nowhere to be found.
"The meeting is at 1:30 so we've got to get you some new clothes and get you out to the WinCo by then."
"WinCo? They're having a super secret spy meeting at the WinCo?! Was the Wal Mart already taken for the Nuclear Defense Arbitration?"
"Do you have something against WinCo?" She asked.
"Well, no. They have terrific prices, and they're employee owned, you see. But it's still not a place to be having terrorist meetings, now is it?"
"And where would you hold them?"
"Uh...I don't know, I've never thought about it. I'm not a terrorist."
"WinCo it is." She motioned for me to follow as she lead me down a long hall to a locker room. There was a new shirt and slacks that looked suspiciously like Adam's waiting for me on a bench.
"Shower and put those on and we'll go." Jane said and shut the door.
I sat down and took off my jacket.
"You're the only one that understands my plight." I said to it. "Trying to be dependable and boring while those hipsters put you on an ironic pedestal. It's terribly unfair."
As I took a shower and put on the clothes of a man I had watched die less than two hours ago I tried to wrap my mind around what was going on. The only solace I could find was that I hadn't done anything epic. It was there, everywhere around me, but I refused to interact with it. What I was doing next would be dangerously E-word related so I would have to do my best to muck it up.
It was my only chance...