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It dawned scarily upon me that both Morgan and I had no idea about what was going on now. I didn't even know exactly what would happen in the fitness testing. I even read the papers I had to sign this time. I've never done that before, but they didn't say anything about being tested on a platform in open air!
I wandered over to a crowd of other parents. All calmly chatting and waving to their highly embarrassed kids on the other side.

http://www.domesticviolence.org/definition/

That is the best link I can find for a good site. Will Re-open this at home so I can get to the site.

SEnding myself the info vie priotag thank you very muhc MR whoever blocks to school system!!

It dawned scarily upon me that both Morgan and I had no idea about what was going on now. I didn’t even know exactly what would happen in the fitness testing. I even read the papers I had to sign this time. I’ve never done that before, but they didn’t say anything about being tested on a platform in open air!

I wandered over to a crowd of other parents. All calmly chatting and waving to their highly embarrassed kids on the other side.  I slowly peered off the ledge behind us. I gulped as I looked down at a straight down drop, like the kind you see in movies where the heroine in dangling off a cliff that seems endless. Mist seemed to swirl below like we were somehow above the clouds. I thought Kain said this test was here because some kids died. It looked to me like they were here because they weren’t killing off enough kids!

All the parents stood chatting. My eyes scanned them all trying to match up kids to their possible parents. I did a double take, for a second I had thought the young redhead had wandered over to the parent’s side. Taking a closer look I scanned from top to bottom. She began with a beautiful gently curving swathe of dark scarlet hair that ran down to exactly half way between her shoulders and elbows.  The gentle waves and curves seemed to be a promise for what was waiting below. Small half moon glasses managed to make her look intelligent yet sparkly. Her suit was obviously tailor made; her lapel held a small black rose head and not a crease was to be seen on her immaculate skirt and jacket.  She like myself was not talking to anyone and the poor woman looked so cold up here arms folded huddling into herself to retain heat; she didn’t appear to have prepared for being up here either.

“Here.” I placed my massive jacket around her petit shoulders. I smiled as she looked drenched in a wrap of black material where the jacket almost reached her knees. 

“Won’t you be cold?” Her voice exuded warmth in such contrast to how cold she appeared to be due to the biting wind.

“No, don’t worry us big guys don’t get cold.” I laughed.

“Well I thank you stranger. May I know the name of my rescuer?” She joked clutching my jacket and pulling it in tighter around her.

“Oh, uh, I’m Mike, Mike of Ollerond.”

“Layla.” She said and ventured her tiny hand from the depths of my jacket and outstretched it in a welcoming handshake.

“So which ones yours?” Not like I needed to ask but it was a conversation starter and hey she might be able to tell me what was going on.

She pointed at Morgan’s friend who was doing complex looking stretches for her left leg. “That’s my Katha. Yours?”

I pointed out Morgan who was faithfully doing the simple warm ups I taught her. She seemed to have regrouped next to the redhead. Which I hoped gave her comfort. “That’s my kiddo. I can tell your girl takes after you, thankfully Morgan takes after her mother.”

“Ahh so your wife is a water affinity?”

“No actually, she was human.” But if she had been Faerie her affinity would have sure been water I thought to myself.

“I’m sorry.” She attempted to put a hand on my shoulder but was forced to settle with placing it on me arm as reaching my shoulder was quite uncomfortable for her. “I know how it feels to lose a partner.” She said and twiddled with the small black rose.

“It’s ok I said. It was a long time ago and we were divorced. She blocked me out after my accident and well I didn’t even meet my Morgan till a month or two back... well it’s a complicated story.”

 

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Those blue eyes Chapter.... Possibly 10 it would be nice if it ended on chapter ten and now I’m pretty much writing the ending now. Still I’ve barely even gotten to navy camp in our story so I don’t know if I can fit 6 months into seven/six chapters.

 

I hate it when people do this, not necessarily that I don’t appreciate the thought but it just makes me feel worse. Juliana and Marc are trying not to be very couple-ish around me, I know they are just trying not to make it show that they are happy in a relationship as a bitter reminder of last night’s break up, but it really doesn’t help. I just feel like I’m adding an extra burden to them now. Before it was fine the four of us were so perfect, it couldn’t have gotten a better situation but alone three is a crowd. Besides I just want them to carry on like normal, like nothing even happened, at least that way I can pretend to myself that nothing’s wrong, like he was never there in the first place, like the piece of my heart that sat in the very centre hasn’t been cruelly ripped out and paraded around in front of me. If I need to be reminded of anything right now is that people love.

It’s a sobering slap in the face when you would die for someone, and I really mean that I would have not thought twice about dying for him. I didn’t think I was worth him, I couldn’t believe I was so lucky to be with him. If he has purposely thrown himself off a building I would have jumped after him and prayed I cushioned his fall.  I would have given everything for him. I already gave everything I could and I would have found a way to give more if I had the chance.

It’s a sobering slap in the face when you would kill yourself for someone and they don’t love you back, when they don’t feel any emotion to you whatsoever. Then they choose themselves over you. Not that I resent him leaving me, his work is far more important than me, I know that. I don’t resent his actions at all, at least he didn’t keep me hanging on any longer. I’m just saying it’s a sobering slap in the face.

I’m coping, I’ve downloaded Mowtown and keeping quite happy, he’s made me a fighter. Problem is when I see him I just want to die. I mean that I feel like I’m collapsing insides. Like I’m just a shell, I literally can’t feel anything apart from a pain ripping every part of my body apart. I can’t speak and the tears well up behind my eyes.

Even if I only see him for a few seconds, All the freedom and happiness I feel just evaporates, Like it never even existed. Its like a blackhole seeing him.

The End

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