Fresh Rambling

Wake up!

The Sarsaparilla Kids are invading.

They want your copy of the Directors Cut.

You open your eyes and see Señor Huggles,

He seems to have a black eye 

But it's shaped like bottle of glue

so you get up and ask Señor Huggles,


But the tiny koala sneers and bites your nose

He tells you to shut up,

then he produces a bushel of rubber bands

and straps them on your shoes,

He tells you that you can jump over a monkey bar with them

only 1 monkey bar? you ask,



The Sarsaparilla Kids:

Like 17 or 36 fruit body children 

They're a major problem for the citizens of  Planet 1,920

Budderchup, a watermelon-demon shaped like a mango, is the leader.

They're almost here! Señor Huggles tells you.

Budderchup starts to shoot seeds out of her watermelon maw

some of them hit you in the eyes.

You're blind now.

at least for the time being.

Señor Huggles tells you to remember that you're blind

and you are confused

suddenly you hear Ryan Gosling, 

But Señor Huggles assures you that is just how Sarsaparilla Kids sound

Ryan Gosling's not here.

So you start to cry out of your blinded eyeballs

You can hear Señor Huggles fighting

You know that The Directors Cut will be safe in his hands

Something bumps your leg and you begin to flail,

Like an inflatable arm-flailing tube man

and you begin to believe that you ARE

so you turn into a tube man

and you flail until you can see again

And you see Señor Huggles

He's holding The Directors Cut tightly

With thousands of Sarsaparilla Kids lying dead around him

You run over to your old friend and begin to cry

In his last dying breath he says:

Go to sleep,

And you do.


(Chapter 3 coming soon :D)




The End

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