I awake.
I begin to feel such emptyness within myself.
I hate what she has made of me.
I detest it.

Every heart shattering comment.
Every time she show me her backside as she walks into another mans arms.
It hurts to live.
Who knew such control could be in the hands of one who could honestly careless....
Did I give her this power?...
Was I not aware of the consequences involved in giving an individual such as her.....everything I have...?...

I rush to another day of school.
She doesnt notice me.
I sit in class wondering;thinking;hoping....

I head to lunch.
I'm not hungry.
I couldnt even think of eating.
My supposed friend approaches me.....
He explains to me that he's the one who holds her heart.
My heart sinks into my chest.
I run.
I don't look back.
I'm araid If I do that they'll be standing together in each others arms.
The very thought of it punctures my heart.
What is this feeling...
This uncomprehendable feeling....
Is this normal...
Why do I care...
I'm at a young age ....girls should come and go.
Or so I'm told.
They don't know how it feels...
How can they simply tell me a line as simple as that and expect to solve my complex problems.
They don't get it.
No one does....

The picture of them together is forever etched into my memory.
I can't take it.
I'm going to break udner pressure.
I'm gasping for air.
People around me see my condition.
They stare and laugh.
I can't take it.
It's too much.

I've gotta get out of here.
I've gotta leave.
It's not like anyone would notice...
So what's stopping me?

The only thing stopping me would be the very thought of her.
The thought of not be able to see her everyday.
The thought of not being able to feel her closeby.

The very thing that makes me want to escape reality is also keeping me here.
Men tell me I'm pitiful.
Men are supposed to have the power I'm told.
They're wrong...
The power is supposed to be balanced....
That's assuming the significant other can return what you're offering...

I'm stuck...
Can't escape...
What do I do now....

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