The screenplay for a comic I am working on. A police comedy set 80 years after a nuclear war ended life as we know it. The city of Devonia slowly rises from the ashes of annihilation while dealing with the constant threat of wasteland bandits, monstrous criminals and insane cyborgs
Narrator - In 1821, the Caledonian Mercury wrote of the British Empire, "On her dominions the sun never sets; before his evening rays leave the spires of Quebec, his morning beams have shone three hours on Port Jackson, and while sinking from the waters of Lake Superior, his eye opens upon the Mouth of the Ganges."
Much has changed in the intervening 260 years. Man in his folly baptised the world in nuclear fire. The skies blackened, continents cracked, glaciers marched north and south, the very axial tilt of Earth itself was thrown off. Life very nearly came to an end shivering in the cold and dark
We see a satellite view of northern Europe by night in 2082, most of it is black, the North-Sea is drained, and glaciers cover everything north of Carlisle. In what was once the county of Devon a vast area glows with electric lights
Narrator - But man is a tenacious animal, 2082 and the last remnants of the British Empire shines brightly against the night, Devonia, the last great city, the last hope for mankind
Cut to a view of shabby concrete tower blocks that fit in with the run down factories, warehouses and industrial plants of the West-Docklands district. The Narrators voice is coming from the window of one of the apartments
Narrator - In this program we will investigate the strange new world we find ourselves in post-apocalypse, from the underground city of Thrak to the rugged grasslands of Doggeland we will be ‘Wasteland Survivors’
Inside the apartment we see that the voice is coming from the television, a DVD has been left playing. Clothes, fast-food packaging and beer cans are strewn over the floor, the TV shows the title card of the show ‘All New Wasteland Survivor’.
Across the room a thirty year old woman, Julia Greene, sleeps deeply in shorts and a vest. She stands around 5'3 with a slender athletic build. Pale skin and freckles are topped off with shoulder length red hair. Suddenly her telephone begins ringing and she drowsily reaches for it with a groan
Julia - Hello? Oh hey Chris! I thought you weren't due back till Sunday...look save it, I'll see you at Brett's in an hour and you can tell me all about it
She puts the coffee pot on, takes her medication and does a workout routine while it brews. Exercise complete she takes her coffee to the big window and sips it while watching the sun rise
Julia: Just beautiful
A short while later we see her dash out of the building and jump on an old fashioned motorcycle. She speeds away past more dirty concrete buildings, taking the main road to the more residential North Docklands district. As she ascends the winding road we see a coal fired power station complex in the distance belching out thick smoke.
Cut to the security fence around the power station, a security guard patrols the grounds, bored after a long night. From the shadows a spider-like quadrupedal mechanoid appears. It stands roughly five feet tall and seven feet long, its twin optical sensors glint red in the morning light, a large gun barrel protrudes from its head. The mechanoid effortlessly jumps over the fence and in one swift movement shoots the guard through the heart
Cut to the exterior of Brett’s Diner, a retro styled fried breakfast establishment surrounded by the crumbling remains of the town of Tavistock, a slum of epic proportions. Julia’s motorcycle is parked in a nearby ally
Chris - ...so by day eight we had exhausted everything, food, medicine, vaccines, all gone. Christ! I knew it was rough outside of the city but I wasn't expecting it to be thaaat bad!
Inside the diner we see Julia is sitting with her twin brother Christopher Midon, a tall man with the build of a professional swimmer. They share a similar colour scheme but he has less freckles and much thicker messier hair. He is smoking a cigarette and drinking a coffee while she wolfs down an enormous breakfast
Julia - I always stick to the north when I go on my little sojourns into the wastes, the Heidevolk may be a little gruff and distrusting of outsiders but at least they strive to make life better for their people
Chris - so what do you think it is with the Waterlander tribes?
Julia - Isn't it obvious?
Chris - I don't know...Arch-Bishop Jürgensen and his Church of the fallen Apple may be complete whack-jobs, but he is a real reforming force in their faith
Julia - But at the core of that faith they are still convinced the rapture has taken place! The worthy were whisked away in a blaze of divine fire and we are just the trash that was left behind, scum of the earth, not fit for heaven let alone happiness
She takes a deep draw from her coffee and sighs
Julia - I just wish they would leave the children out of it or stop bloody breeding. I know its the end of the world and all, but bringing kids into the world just so you can starve them because you think their suffering will get you a shot at the afterlife...
Chris - It is pretty fucking repugnant when you put it like that
Julia - At least you are doing what you can Chris! Tagging along with missionary convoys and bringing aid to those who need it most. You can't tell them what to believe...but you sure as hell can help the kids survive long enough to make up their own mind
Cut to two uniformed policemen driving down a slightly less shabby part of North Docklands in a small police car. A handful of people are going about their business, two female joggers run along the sidewalk. Frank is in his twenties, tall and dark haired, Bill is approaching forty, with shaggy brown hair and a goatee.
Officer Bill - God I’m bored!
Officer Frank - Come on man, you gotta look at he positives; We made it through a whole shift without having to do any real work, handle any stiffs or even come close to getting stabbed
Officer Bill - Yeah, I s’pose your right
He slows down the car as he drives past the joggers admiring their buttocks as they pass
Officer Frank - And the early morning view is pretty stunning
Officer Bill - Ha-ha, always got your priorities right eh Frank
A massive explosion rips through the air, the joggers scream, and a mass of black smoke rises in the distance.
Officer Frank - Shit Bill, that’s gotta be the gasworks! Buckle up!
They speed away towards the explosion
Julia and Chris sit in silence sipping coffee, he brightens up slightly
Chris - So how has the city been holding up without me? Any good riots or terrorist attacks to put my hardships in perspective?
Julia - Not a peep. I've barely stepped foot outside of the academy since you left
Chris - Any promising talent in this years batch?
Julia - I've been really impressed, year on year the cadets are just getting better and better
Chris - You can blame the farmers for that, don't underestimate the power of proper nutrition
Julia - There is one who looks really hopeful, a little angsty, but a complete natural with a rifle, damn smart too
She winks at him
Julia - You’d like her, a right little neogoth, all boobs, bad attitude and bleach blond spikey hair
He gives a cheeky smirk
Chris - I’m but a simple man
He lights up a cigarette and smiles mischievously
Officers Bill and Frank are driving in a hurry towards the explosion
Frank - Damn! Control says they have word of one of those mechanical terrorists things fleeing the scene
Officer Bill - Jesus Christ Frank!
They accidentally crash into the fleeing mechanoid as it rounds a corner
Back in Brett’s Diner, Julia and Chris are finishing up breakfast
Chris - So there wasn’t even an itsy-bitsy little bank robbery or hostage crisis to keep you busy?
She looks mischievously
Julia - It might sound a little heartless, but I've almost been praying for something to go wrong
She looks frustrated
Julia - I'm an adrenaline junkie, I just need a little action dammit!
The mechanoid crashes through the window of the diner showering glass everywhere
Chris - what the hell!!!!
In a flash Julia grabs him and knocks the table over to shield them from the flying glass, other patrons are not so lucky. The mechanoid clambers to its feet and exits through the window, blasting with its machine gun at an unseen target
Julia - are you hurt?
Chris - Nah, I'm fine, just a little shaken
She stands up and talks to the room authoritively
Julia: get everyone out to the kitchen and keep low. Brett! Call this in; we need tactical units here ASAP!
The bearded cafe owner nods to her and runs over to the telephone on the wall. She pulls an automatic pistol from her handbag
Chris - you're not going to try and arrest that thing are you?
She looks at him seriously and replies in a faux-melodramatic style
Julia - You have the hands of a healer Chris, the suffering of innocents hurts you like it was your own pain, its what drives you to do the amazing things you do
There is an extended burst of machine gun fire and deathly screams coming from outside
Julia - That same fiery righteous indignation drives me too
She pulls back the slide on the pistol and chambers a round while winking at him playfully
Julia - I just have a slightly different skill set to express it
She clambers out of the window as Chris leads the injured patrons into the kitchen smiling to himself and shaking his head
Chris - Such a ham
Officers Bill and Frank are hiding behind their upturned car, stun guns drawn, the mechanoid faces off against them
Officer Frank - Freeze tin-man!
Infiltrator-mech - Ha-ha! Do you really think you can take me down meatstick?! With rubber bullets and truncheons?!
The policemen stand up and open fire, the mechanoid swiftly returns the favour shredding parts of the car. Julia knocks Bill out of the way just in time to save him from getting shot through the chest; one of the bullets grazes his shoulder.
Officer Bill - Thanks Miss, but this area isn’t safe for civilians
He looks up and realizes who she is
Officer Bill: Detective Inspector Greene, sorry ma’am
Julia - It’s Bill right? How’s the shoulder?
He smiles at her
Officer Bill - It’s just a scratch thanks to you
Julia - Good, I’m going to need your gun arm
She pulls a couple ammunition magazines out of her bag and hands one to each of them
Julia - Here take these; you’re going to need some real bullets. It looks like a Neuralink Infiltrator model combat-mech! Fast, agile, well protected and packing one big-ass machine gun! These rounds won't put a dent in the main armour but if you aim for the eyes and the artificial muscle at the joints we should be able to slow it down till the tactical unit gets here
She checks her shoe laces and dumps her bag on the floor
Julia - God knows how they got that kind of hardware away from the oil fields and into the city without anyone knowing. On my mark I want you to lay down some covering fire. I’m going to try and lead it into the abandoned factory over the road, try and minimise civilian casualties
Bill and Frank - Right!
Julia - Mark!
Bill and Frank stand up and open fire on the mechanoid while Julia sprints down the road. The policemen duck back down as the mechanoid returns fire. Julia makes it to the gateway of the condemned factory before shooting out one of its eyes. It turns its full attention to her
Infiltrator-mech - fuck you shorty!
Julia shoots it in the head again and the mechanoid charges at her while unleashing its machine gun on full auto. She fires twice more and jumps out the way as it crashes into the wall behind her. She runs into the grounds of the factory as it craws out of the rubble.
Infiltrator-mech - You think making me waste all my bullets is going to help you! I’ll pop your pretty little brain out!
She comes out from her hiding place, a spool of cable in her hand.
Julia - Looks like we are both out of bullets. You ready to dance the old fashioned way?
Infiltrator-mech - You have got to be fucking kidding me!
In a flash she pulls a hatchet from her belt and flings it into the damaged eye socket of the mechanoid. It bellows with rage and charges her again but she slips under it, wrapping cable around a couple legs as she goes. Back on their feet the mechanoid makes several more attempts to grab her, each time she scoots over or under it wrapping more cable as she goes. Finally it catches her with one of its legs, sending her flying
Infiltrator-mech - Did you really think a little bit of rope was going to stop me? This body is designed for desert warfare bitch!
Julia - Who said anything about rope? She holds up a small electronic box
Julia - Det-cord bitch!
She presses the button and the detonation cord explodes, slicing the mechanoid apart and ending the fight in a flash. Chris and the two policemen are standing in the gateway of the factory peering into the cloud of smoke and dust
Julia strolls out of the gate smiling, the mechanoids severed head in her hand. She winks at him
Julia: I think the first beer is on you tonight!