Losing & Winning & More Intense Conversations

I'd lost. Roy had won me over. In more then one sense of course.

We were together now, it was as simple as that. But was it really? We were dating, yes, but not in a literal sense. We didn't go out to the cinemas or for dinner or anything like that. Nor did we show any physical signs of affection towards eachother. We just...hung out, like we were pals. But a lot of people in school had figured it out already.

"The Enigma and Former Enigma Are Together". I'd almost expected that to make the headlines as we walked down the corridors of the school with people's eyes staring daggers into us. Being the girl I am, I stopped and talked to people for a few minutes, with Roy patiently waiting behind me. I was being polite. Polite was me. But none of them dared ask me the question: do you love him?

It wasn't only in the romantic sense that Roy had won. He'd also won in the sense that he held the painting...for now. Wooing me with his skills of kissing, he'd left me dumb as I nodded stupidly when he'd asked if he could keep the painting. Only the next day, did I realize what I'd done.

"I don't get why people do drugs," he muttered, stabbing his fork into a peice of macoroni.

I snapped out my reverie and looked up at him and followed his gaze towards the emo group of the school. They were high, it was obvious. The students passing by, shot them looks of disgust. Turning back to face Roy, I shrugged.

"Their way of distracting themself, I think."

"Distracting themself from what? What are they going through that leads them to take heroin and pot?"

"Issues, perhaps. Roy, just one question. Why do you think so much about other people?"

He directed his gaze back at me and smiled a little.

"It's interesting to know how the human mind works."

"Then explore your own," I muttered, rolling my eyes.

He laughed, his eyes sparkling. "Not everyone has the same mind, Celeste," he said softly and this time his eyes bore into mine as he scrutinized me.

"The thing about you...it's hard for me to figure you out. To know you."

I snorted at that, his eyes took on a lighter stare when he heard me.

"What?" He asked.

""It's hard for me to figure you out". Pfft. I mean look at me. The moment you see me, you know its the enthusiast, the clown. The one who makes peoples day. The way I act, it's social and happy. How can I be hard to figure out when I'm like...like this?"

He smiled softly and leaned across the table, running his hand through my hair and stroking my face.

"How do I know it's not an act?"

"Trust me," I said simply.

Then looking past me, he dropped his hand and got up.

"Where are you going?"

Not replying, he headed over to the emo table and sat there, starting to talk with some dude. I sighed and got up to join him. It was always like this now. Whenever I thought he was going to break my bubble of personal space again and just kiss me, he'd move away and do something random. Was he afraid of loving me? Mentally shrugging, I approached the emo table and sat down next to a girl.


She turned around and stared at me as if to say 'who the hell are you?!' But after a moment, she gave in and smiled a bit at me. "Hello."

The End

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