Delusional Diaries

There once lived a short little man named Perrie, who liked to eat cheesecake. He grew so fond of cheesecake that he eventually bought a cheesecake store, but it went broke because he kept eating the products. Because of such horrible eating habits, Perrie gained a lot of weight, and it got so bad that he was almost as wide as he was tall, which should be physically impossible.

Perrie was not delusional. He knew he needed to go on a diet, but because he was a very annoying person, nobody wanted to help him on his journey. Lonesome and sad, Perrie began to eat excessively again.

It's about time a new character is introduced, because it would not be healthy for Perrie to eat continuously without some intervention.

Lisa was tall and slender and elegant, but she was socially awkward, and had mild paranoia. At parties, she stuck out like a stick in the mud; a sore thumb. She was the one everyone assumed to have been invited by someone else.

It's a mystery how Lisa and Perrie met. Their meeting must have been strange, but I wouldn't know. I would tell you if I could, but I don't, so I won't, because I don't want to be a liar, and make up stuff off the top of my head, and tell you about people that don't really exist who have really touching problems that you almost believe.

Lisa and Perrie were not sexually attracted to each other, because Perrie hated dating taller women, and Lisa hated human beings in general. Curiously, however, they became good friends (part of this was because Perrie looked so strange that Lisa didn't really consider him to belong with the human species). It was an awekward relationship. Lisa didn't really trust Perrie with her problems, partly because she believe she didn't have any, and that it was simply the rest of the world that was different. Perrie, on the other hand, had such an obnoxious personality that he would interrupt Lisa in her middle of her non-personal-revealing-nothing-about-oneself sentence to complain aggressively about nothing relevant.

One day, something happened that disrupted their daily routine of annoying the reader with their strange habits, but being perfectly happy with each other.



The End

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