Bootsy and the old guy become fast friendsMature

This old hard-ass might require a little prompting, “And you are?”

The old man set his jaw and grimaced as he sized up the young man standing before him. Eventually he figured it would be easier to converse with him than knock him out and throw him in the water outside. He grumbled, “Leroy Cloose, Pleased to make your acquaintance... asshole.”

Okay, well I'm sorry I beat you up, Leroy.”

No you didn't.”

Didn't what?”

You didn't beat me up,” Leroy clarified.

Ummmm,” Bootsy motioned to the floor with his right arm, “a minute ago, you were over there with my boot up your ass.”

Uh-huh. Is that where you get that nickname? Is that a gay thing? Anyway, I was about to knock your fuckin' teeth outta your skull when you turned on those lights.”

Bootsy's blood pressure rose a tick but he kept his even demeanor, “Soooooo, I'm beginning to see why your nose has been broken so many times.”

It ain't all junkyard brawls, you know.”


Leroy shrugged a little sheepishly, “Well, you know... back in the day.”

Back in the day what?”

A huge grin spread across Leroy's split lips, showing a lot of pink teeth, “Back in the day, it seems certain fellas would get kind of upset to come home and find me in their ladyfriend's bedroom.”

Ah,” Bootsy nodded in understanding. Leroy needn't expound; Bootsy could picture that particular scene easily enough.

There aren't too many mobsters left in this town these days.”

You might be surprised, young one.”

Yeah, well, I'm going after the biggest.”

Leroy didn't say whether or not he knew about whom Bootsy was talking. He said only, “Good luck with that.”

She owes me something.”

Course she does.”

Something big.”

Right,” he nodded, “and you're just the type of guy whose gonna get back what she owes you.”

Something like that, yeah.”

Leroy nodded, “Kay.”

Kay? Kay what?”

Nothing. But can I have those nice boots you're wearing after she rips your guts out your asshole? Cuz my boots are probably older than your daddy's pubes.”

Bootsy scowled; that was in poor taste. He replied, “Probably. I've never met my father. But can I get you something from Dee Dee's place?”

Leroy shook his head wildly, “No thanks, bub. I don't want nothin' from that bitch.”

Bootsy smiled and nodded knowingly. It was probably wise to stay as far away from Dee Dee Slayde as possible, “I understand.”

But if you happen to stumble across some night vision goggles, I wouldn't say no.”

I'll add that to the shopping list, but I wouldn't hold my breath. Maybe I can dig up another twenty-pound Mag Lite for you to bash people over the back of the head with.”

Leroy spat a great big glob of blood on the floor and said, “I gotta call the night janitor, he's probably at some bar again. Whyn't you sneak out the back, like the way you came in?”

Bootsy nodded and turned to leave.

And Bootsy?”

Yeah, Leroy?”

Don't be stupid and die.”

The End

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