unknownMature

I've been working this odd job, a literal deal with the gods, for a couple years now. Not many people who know me are aware of what I do. I don't go to work in the traditional sense. My cell phone is my contact with my higher ups. Because it works on some other-worldly powers, I always have reception. That's right, up yours Telus.

Personal grudges aside,  my job also provides the best benefits in this world. How many employers can guarantee that you cannot die? The process of death may break your mind and soul. However, you can always come back if you so choose. Other perks include supernatural powers and unlimited pay. I always get asked how I make my money. I just say I play the markets with the money I won after years of buying lottery tickets. In these dark economic times, the stakes are high. If you know where to look, the money flows that much faster.

I digress.

The down sides to this job are only a few. You are always on call, unless you book time off well in advance and another Stalker deals with whatever comes through during that time. The beasts you deal with are the only other real downer of this job. I once had to kill a behemoth eighty feet tall that looked like a gorilla with spikes that could demolish a building with a one punch. If dealing with that doesn't turn your pants into a shit smear then you are way crazier than me.

It's kinda like being a superhero. You show up, defeat the threat, save the day and no one ever knows. You even get decked out in a costume and armour if you so choose, but I found that even though the armour is supposed to be unbreakable it can still break. Same goes for weapons too. Whenever you want, you can use any weapon you want. I've always found swords to be more versatile than spears, axes, guns, whatever the hell suits your fancy. I'm wondering if I should upgrade though. When I pulled my latest sword out of that dragon's skull, there were cracks all along the blade. Something about dragons always manages to break the unbreakable. I think I'll talk to Dusty about...

*ring-ring*

Uh oh...

I flip open my phone.

"Yeah?"

"New assignment, I'm sending you the location of the rift."

A map image appears on my screen.

Shit. At least it's away from people this time.

Hehe, getting there's the best part of the job. Like I said before, working for a god has a lot of benefits. I can get just about anything I want. I've got a custom bike that I saw in a CG movie but I added active camouflage so I can be invisible while I ride it. It couldn't actually work if I hadn't got it from Dusty. I love flying down roads, whipping past cars that don't even know I'm there, at speeds that would be illegal on the autobahn.

I kick open the door to my garage, walk past my Porsche and hop on my bike. I flip the switch that opens up the sides like a fan which holds my swords. I strap on my favourite, open up my garage door, and punch the gas so hard, I wheelie in place for a second. As soon as my front tire touches I'm already breaking the speed limit.

The End

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