Gregory's Letter

Dear Sir,

I'm not here to cause any ill feelings, Mr. Claus, but I do have some recommendations for you this Christmas.  As the president and sole member of my grade too  two progressive thinkers club, , I,  have been nothing less than benelovent ,and project myself contuing this trend until year end. 

   You will find most of my list embraces sustainability. You may well agree that the future of our planet depends heavily on self sacrifice and wise planning so my list reflects that.

Since bamboo is en easily renewable resource, I would welcome some bamboo "choo choo" style trains. 

The Cybertronic hyperkinetic battle set seems, regrettably, to be only available in plastic.  We all have to be realistic about sustainabilty, and while moderation is key to maintaining momentum,  I will keep that on the list. 

Below I have footnoted several other plastic/die cast metal items that I would beseech you to find bamboo alternatives.  If they have to be plastic, however, I will, albeit begrudgingly, invite you to pursue purchasing/manufacturing them for me. 

(The bamboo "choo choo" style train is not a must have, but a "would be nice" by the way).

Sir, major department stores' wish lists are clearly endorsed with your cheerful countenance. Yet many of the gifts I wish for, are made in countries like Taiwan or Malaysia.  I think that we both know the child labour problems some of these countries are enduring and have a tough time swallowing the irony. 

If, in fact, those products are indeed made  with less fortunate children's bleeding hands, please keep items 3-29 on the list, however, with fair warning that they will , upon my conscience, not be on my list next year.  In the face of all called integrity, I must insist on that

Sir, your constant and lasse faire dance macabre with the people at Coca Cola Company reeks of conspiracy with the devil we know as Big Sugar.  In protest, I must then request Pepsi.  Two cases.

Lastly, research has shown that methane gas, uncontained is a princely contributor to climate change.  We're all making sacrifices.  Mom and Dad just switched to from a gas powered sedan to a hybrid SUV (4 wheel drive), so I wonder if you could get by on six reindeer.  Perhaps Donner and Blitzer could find some light duty work. 

In light of the trite and questionable practice of leaving out cookies and milk, I have donated, in your honour, one box of dried apricots to the local food bank.  It surprises me more than any other how one could call themselves "mother" and assume that a seven year old could enjoy such a "snack".  Yet, in the spirit of goodwill , I heartily endeavour that there be someone hungry enough to enjoy them.

Your faithful servant and ethical watchdog,

Gregor Q. LePlante


Grade Too Two Society of Forward Thinkers

Ms. Jones' Division,


The End

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