"You're very highly strung aren't you."
"Yeah, well your balls are very tightly hung. What did you say to the Jahova's?"
"I said that we were Christian and that he should try number 54."
"Number 54? But that is where Mr Rashid lives."
"Yeah I know. I told the Jahova's that he doesn't have a tree up at Christmas, so maybe he might be interested in joining their clan."
"OK again they are not a clan, and Mr Rashid is a Sikh. Why on God's Earth would a Sikh wan't to convert to a Jahova's."
"Strictly speaking if he is a Sikh it wouldn't be God's Earth. And anyway, even if he is a Sikh, he could still have a tree at Christmas. I mean, why would you want to miss an opportunity to have loads of fun."
"Because he is a Sikh you imbosile. To him, Christmas is just the 25th December. It doesn't mean anything, it is just a date to him."
"Yeah, but he is missing out on all the presents and crackers."
"You really do have the mental capacity of a 6 year old don't you?"
"At least I don't have the cock size of a six year old."
"Oh really. Meow meow."
"We agreed no talking about that."
"I don't give a shit."
"I don't know if I can ever trust you again now."
"Well you're gonna have to, bearing in mind that you live in my house."
"Whatever. Hey what have you put about the night we met? Is that seriously what you are going to write about how we met?"
"Why shouldn't I?"
"Maybe because it is total bullshit."
"Shut up Danny."
"Why don't you just say that we met in Fernando's lap dancing club."
"I am not writing that we met in a lap dancing club. I don't want the entire world to know where we actually met. What would people think of us."
"Well you can find out because the computer has typed everything you just said."