By the time I was four, I lost the ability to walk. I spent most of the time trapped in a cupboard so like talking I forgot. I was trapped in the cupboard for weeks on end, Dean managed to talk to me at least twice every few days. Our father often went to the bar to drink. Dean was eight when he got his first beer.
Dad had returned with a six pack and took me out of the cupboard and dumped me on the floor like an unwanted toy. Me and Dean never wore any clothes....guess it was easier for him that way. Straight away Dad pulled Dean close and began to play with Dean's small penis. Then he took Dean to do the same with me, Dean did so as well how can you say no to the very person that fears you the most but at the same time you hope he'll return to the hero you once knew? Then my Dad handed Dean a beer and told him to drink it. Dean drank the beer and not suprisingly got drunk, yet he was told to drink all six beer bottles. Dean passed out from drunkness where I was picked up and dumped in an bath full of ice. I don't remember how long I was kept in the bath but I do remember that I passed out from the coldness.
After that day, Dean was often told to drink beer and then later drugs.
Dean was made an addict to coke at eight years old. My Dad use to tie me to the table and pour the coke over me and then told Dean to sniff it up. Dean did so every time and got high. I felt sorry Dean in those drunk or high times, he couldn't control himself and use to get scared afterwords.
It wasn't long before Dad was getting Dean drunk everyday and where I was taken out of the cupboard Dean was getting high. Once he was sober again, I could hear his frightened tears and begging never for it to happen again. Of course it always did, my Dad was twisted.
Even though I was being hurt, Dean's hated being drunk or high more. During our one-sided convosations Dean would tell him how he would wake up in strange places....sometimes not even in the motel. Years later I realised that Dean was being sold out to other men....men who knew the poor treatment me and my brother were getting but did nothing about it. Years later I also found out my Dad use to take pornographic pictures of Dean. In many ways, Dean suffered more then I ever knew until after his death.