Too much to stop, too much, too mcuh

 

I felt the pull as soon as Carlisle's words sunk in.  I felt the need for human blood. And here was Carlisle allowing me to kill my father. I wouldn't be able to stop, even with my gift. Edward was able to stop with me, because he was, well, amazing. Also, he had decades of practice. Practice of restraining and the soul. The soul to know right from wrong. I would give in. Give into the frenzy. It would be too much to stop. I wouldn't be able to. I had only had a few years of practice, while Edward and Carlisle and Alice had plenty. There had to be another way. But as I glanced around the room, I saw no other syringes. Charlie's body was still bouncing crazily. Alice and Edward were both bent down to Charlie. Nessie and Billy were pressing the needles into Charlie's skin. Nessie began to squeeze the syringe, wincing with every bit further that she pushed.

Alice looked up from Charlie's wrist.

"That's it . We can't do it, there's not enough blood for the venom to mix with. We can't...." Her voice broke. Edward tenor voice was muffled on Charlie's skin.

"Keep going Alice, Carlisle wants us to continue. Bella," he peered at me, my arms wrapped around my torso. I was weak. He knew it. He didn't need to say anything more, because I knew he was going to tell me to leave if this was too difficult. I hung my head and squeezed my eyes shut tight, wishing this would all go away. I heard Renesmee's small whimpering's next to me.

"Grandpa, no, grandpa please no." I heard the tears drop on the  wooded floor. If I could have cried I would have. Without thinking, I raced over to the left side of the table and leaned down to Charlie wrist. I took and deep breath and whispered,

"I'm sorry."

The End

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