Devil; misunderstood nice guy.

The morning skipped along at its usual pace, dreadfully slow for those who waited in anticipation of what the afternoon might bring and mercilessly fast for those who wanted nothing more than to stop time for as long as they could; but for the devil, all of this was immaterial. He had other things to occupy his mind while he waited for his guest who according to his watch (one featuring Daffy Duck)ought to be here in a few minutes.

His mind quickly going through possible ice breakers he looked up to see a rather attractive waitress bend down to ask him what he wanted. He raised an eyebrow surprised at first, before he realized and remembered that he had an open menu in front of him. Shaking his head at himself for allowing such a gross lapse in attention... wow, she definitely was pretty. He watched her tuck a few strands of silvery blonde hair behind her ear in an exasperated manner, that would have made any Demon's day. Luckily for him, those very strands were planing another great escape.

"What would you like, sir?"

"Sir? No, please, call me Neville," he said with a charming smile, pausing to read her name tag before looking back at the girl who he knew was about 23 years 4 months 5 days and just over an hour and a half old, give or take a few seconds. Being the Devil and pretty much in the same league as God had its benefits.

"And yes, would you be so kind enough as to get me a Chocolate Shake... Um, with everything you could possibly add to it... Just hold those nuts. Thanks, Alex."

She offered him a sweet smile and left, leaving the Devil who currently was going by the name Neville to watch her leave imagining the cogs in her mind classifying him as just another flirt. The Devil on the other hand smiled, perhaps just a little evilly, as he watched her leave towards the counter, enjoying the gentle swish of her skirt with every step. Life was good...

Sadly, Fate wasn't too impressed with the view he'd afforded himself and chose that moment to have his cell begin to vibrate, the Imperial March rising slowly from the depths of his pocket. Sighing and averting his gaze he picked up the cell.


Neville. That was the Devil's name for this century... sadly it hadn't really caught on as well as his other's. Satan, Lucifer, Mephistopheles, Hades, and the like. Everybody seemed to like his more dramatic names actually. Nobodye ever remembered him when he was Dave, Sameer, or Chan. The century had only just begun and he was already having the sinking the feeling that this one as well would pass into obscurity.

While a part of him mourned the loss of a perfectly good name, he did manage to feel pleased at the news one of his generals had to relay. A rather wealthy and undoubtably corrupt businessman had just paid the ransom for his daughter to an untraceable account. The daughter had been returned and the blame would be put on a bunch of men who had managed to get out of prison earlier for much worse than kidnapping... The money... well, they'd fund a new console for Neville while the WWF would be recieving a sizeable donation in a few days.

"Great work... I'll meet you back at home later. Tell the others will you?"

With a final nod he snapped the phone shut and pushed it neatly back into his pocket and looked around to see if he might get another look at the waitress - Alex, but once again Fate was against his roving eyes.

Only this time it really was Fate. The Devil gulped and looked up at his Ex, a shockingly beautiful woman with angular features, eyes that could see through walls and melt stone and raven hair that cascaded abour her in a manner that could only be described as perfect.

"Hello, Neville..." she said with enoug venom to make a snake sick to its stomach, as she sat down in front of him, arms crossed in front of her while the best pair of legs the Devil had ever seen followed suit.

"Um, hey. So... How've you been?"

Ok, so th Devil may be reputed to be teh smoothest talker known to earth... but that title was nothing, when he found himself talking to Fate. The one person who could actually mess with him and suceed without falling prey to anything herself.

A fact she was proud of and took advantage of.

"Oh just peachy... Neville. And before you ask... That waitress you were eying..."

There was a sudden commotion from the general area of the kitchens followed by shouts and yells... which was then followed by a man helping the waitress, her eyes stained with tears out of the resteraunt.

"Pity they forgot to put up a wet floor sign, isn't it?"

"You really need to stop doing that." he said evenly, though inside, he was already trying to set into motion a series of events that might see the girl get something out of this... That boy who was helping her. He seemed to have feelings for her... perhaps if he...

"And you aren't? I see that look in your eye... What i did was perfectly within my rights, anyways. You had no business..."

"No business?!" Neville burst out, ""No business?! Are you kidding me? We're divorced Fate... Divorced. It wasn't even my idea... It was all you! It took me 200 years, the dark ages, and a freakin' plague to get over you and now you won't even let me check other women out?!"

"More or less, yeah..."

He stared at her in utter disbelief.... a single thought repeating itself in his mind like a programmed electronic sign - Why?

The End

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