I paid him...didn't I?
Those were the only words buzzing around my head as I trudged along home, feeling more lonely than I had in my entire life. The stone of guilt had dropped in my belly, sucking down all of my spit with it, making my mouth drier than a desert. My eyes, on the other hand, seemed to be somehow using that spit and ran it as salty tears down my cheeks. I continued to march, wondering why the idiot dealer went after Blake instead of me...
I mean, I could take a beating. Much more than Blake could, anyway. I was used to it. He...he wasn't.
There was no undoing what I'd done...I missed Blake already. I sighed to myself as I slid back into my house, wanting now more than ever to just take something enough to end it all.