It's Retina now, Human Artillery!
Okay, so I lived in Wyoming all my life. Last year, while out on a road trip, I was attacked by a rattlesnake. To be fair, it wasn't my fault. My three year-old sister was going to play with it, so I got between her and the snake. I guess I startled it, so it attacked. I'm not even quite sure how, but it got up at my face and bit me, right on my left eyeball. At the hospital, they noticed that although the poison hadn't spread throughout the rest of my body yet, it was corroding my eyeball. Long story short, they took it out.
Afterwards, my father (also a scientist; small world isn't it, Andrew?) built me this bionic eye. It gives me incredible vision, automatically adjusting itself so that my other eye doesn't feel weird in comparison. I think the picture resolution is around 70 megapixels. I have an optical zoom level of x108 and can shoot lasers as well. Plus, I have photographic memory now. So yeah, although it really hurt to get bitten by the snake, this new eye is pretty decent... oh! How did I turn to superheroing? Well, one of the representatives from ASI actually came to our house in Wyoming and recommended me. Neat, huh?
Your turn, Heelix!