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Captivated

I awoke next in captivation.  The feelings have all faded into nothingness and I find myself forgetting more of the memories and more of the names than I have ever done before.  The lack of feelings makes me crave for fear, but the craving subsided into the under rated idenity of lost cause.  

Don't look into your past. a voice whispered in the dark.  You will be frightened.

"But I wish to be frightened!  I wish to know and feel!  I must have once or I would not want it so much," I begged.  The darkness seemed to inhale my words whole, like a dog engulfing his dog food while still in his mind wanting what the humans had.  I felt alone.  I felt sorry for no reasons I could remember.  All I know is that I had done something wrong.

I needed to walk and to get away.  I needed to find my life and my sanity.  I needed to find anything.  It wasn't a moment later when I felt a tap on my shoulder.  I whirled around, knowing the thing that had done so would have disappeared anyway.  I felt dizzy and sick, but still no sense of any real emotion.  I felt stomach acid reach it's way up my throat and spew onto the cold desolate ground with a splash.  As I fell to my knees I allowed my hands to touch the floor and my chest to heave in unnatural tones.  Sweat dripped down the side of my neck and down my chest.  The hair on my arms and lets prickled and stood straight and I felt every aspect of fear except the feeling of fear itself.  I rolled over, my skin enjoying the cold of the floor and stared up into the black screen of a ceiling. 

"Who am I, where am I, and how did I come?"  The silence seemed to poison my ears and the darkness blind my eyes.

Too late you are.  The end has already begun.  

 

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