"When was the last time you looked in the mirror?"
That was the waking thought every morning, and usually the last thought before bed. When? Not just looking, or a glimpse upon passing, but analyzing, scrutinizing each detail that can be labeled.
"Go to the mirror, you need to go now and look at what you have become...I mean seriously. Do you even like writing? Why do you even bother."
The thought of failure always looming.
"Its one step behind you, if you don't go look right now" said the voice. "You are giving up your position, getting flanked as we converse"
"Why do you do this to me? Why do you constantly remind me about these things, as if i don't know what will happen" I replied with such force that the voice quivered its last words before retreating to the confines of the darkness.
"You don't know they are alive....be meticulous"
With that hiss the haze grew and the voice left.
It has always been hard, but the guidance has now grown into commands and I have always know perfectly well I am wanted.