When I woke up the next morning, I was greeted by several texts from Eden apologising for how she behaved the night before and asking me to forget it ever happened and consider going on another date with her. I texted her back a little later on letting her know I’d had a great time anyway and I’d love to go out with her again, which no doubt cheered her up. It was then that I noticed the message from Alex, which contained a picture of my kids covered almost head to toe in glitter. I shook my head, sighing a little as I got up to make myself some breakfast, hoping they’d give the kids a bath before I went to get them. It’d take days for all that glitter to wash off.
I went to pick them up after lunch, enjoying the peace and quiet at home, and was instantly tackled to the ground by Alex when I got there.
"Get down. They'll see you" he said and I laughed. “I already lost my pardner to ‘em” he said, putting on this fucking awful American accent. “You ain’t gon’ betray me too are ya?”
"Maybe" I said, pretending to consider it.
"Ah cayn't do this alone" he said, putting an imaginary cowboy hat over his heart.
"Is that accent s'posed to be American?" I laughed.
"I'd like to see you try an English accent" he laughed, punching my arm lightly. "Show off" he said huffily when I didn’t do too bad.
I let out a laugh. "Where's ginger anyway?"
"He decided to be on the kids' side. He's mean to me" he pouted. "No sex for him tonight"
"You'll regret that later"
"Will I now?" he asked and I nodded, making him chuckle. "Maybe I'll hide out at yours"
"Oh will you now?"
"Well I'll need somewhere to hide"
"You're more than welcome to if you can put up with the kids for another night"
"They won't be bugging me for sex" he laughed.
"No, they'll be bugging you for candy and attention instead"
"I can cope with that"
"And can you trust the ginger?"
"I'll leave him with a box of sex toys. I'm sure there's one hidden away at yours" he giggled and I shot him a glare. He held up his hands defensively. "I didn't mean for you" he laughed. "I just know what Maxxie was like"
"Good" I said, still glaring.
"But I'll bet they haven't exactly gone unused" he winked and I rolled my eyes. "What?"
"I'll have you know sex hasn't been on my list of priorities since Maxxie died"
"I'm only joking Bunny" he said, ruffling my hair.
"I'm totally innocent" he grinned.
"I'm teaming up with the kids"
"Why must everyone I love leave me?" he asked, pretending to be offended.
"Because you're mean to them"
"No one understands British humour around here" he sulked.
"Funnily enough that's 'cause we're not British"
"I thought you might learn"
"Pwease forgive me?" he pouted, fluttering his eyelashes.
"Why should I?"
"Because I love you" he said innocently.
"Thought you loved ginger?"
"I love him as my husband, and I love you as my friend"
"I don't feel very loved" I said, earning myself a hug.
"Better?" he asked and I nodded. He laughed. "Good" he said, looking around. "Ginger is being very quiet"
As if on cue, Caleb jumped on Alex, knocking him on the floor.
"I win!" Caleb yelled.
"You got me! You got me!" Alex said, genuinely looking scared.
Caleb spat on his palm, wiping it on Alex’s face. The cheeky fucker wiped it off and wiped it on me instead.
"Eww" I said, making Caleb giggle.
"And what exactly were you two chattering about?"
"British humour and how bad Americans are at learning to understand it" Alex said.
"Shame, I thought you might've been planning a threesome"
"No, there's no sex for you tonight. You betrayed me" Alex said huffily.
"Pwease" Caleb said, breaking out the puppy eyes.
"No" Alex said, just as huffily as before.
"Then I guess I'll have to find someone else for tonight" Caleb said innocently and Alex shot him a tiny glare.
"I think you should find a way to apologise to me"
Caleb kept up the puppy eyes, sitting in Alex’s lap and palming him slightly.
"Bunny's here to get the kids, they'll be gone in a minute"
"What if Bunny wants to stay for dinner?"
"Then we'll have to sneak off for a bit, won't we?"
"Will we?" he asked and Caleb nodded. "But we would have guests. It would be rude to sneak off while we're entertaining"
"No it wouldn't" Caleb grinned.
"It would, wouldn't it, Bunny?"
"I'm gonna have to side with Caleb on this one" I chuckled as he directed the puppy eyes at me instead.
"Because what Caleb says goes"
"How does that work?"
"We both know he'll sulk if he doesn't get his own way"
"But you'll all stay for dinner?"
"If you want us to"
"Sure" Alex smiled.
I smiled back as Caleb pawed at Alex.
"Make yourself at home, then" Alex grinned.
I tracked down the kids, seeing they were just as glittery as they’d been in the photo Alex sent me, and tried not to laugh at Caleb pawing at Alex even more. Alex pecked him on the lips before heading into the kitchen.
"Hadley, come have special fun times with me" Caleb whined.
"I don't think Alex would like me if I did that" I laughed, hearing Alex tut from the kitchen.
"You're more than welcome to come apologise to me in here while I get dinner ready"
Caleb went off to “apologise” and I did my best to keep the kids entertained and out of the kitchen. I’m not stupid, I knew exactly what Caleb was doing in there. Alex came out eventually with the food, and I made sure the kids were polite, and said thank you for everything when it was time to go.
"Any time. You're always welcome to come over" Alex smiled.
I returned the smile, wrapping him in a hug when he kissed my cheek. Caleb came over, smothering me in a hug and pretty much Frenching me, making Alex roll his eyes.
"What?" Caleb asked innocently.
"You just are" he said, kissing him. "Get your gorgeous ass in bed, I'll be up in a bit"
Caleb’s eyes practically lit up and he scurried off upstairs.
"I don't think he'll wait very long, so unless you wanna hang around with the TV up loud..." Alex chuckled, making me laugh.
"I'll see you later. Don't be too mean to him"
"I won't" he said, hugging me goodbye.
I made a mental note to kill the both of them when we got outside. Apparently it hadn’t taken them long to get it on, since we could hear them from outside. And of course, the kids asked what they were doing. I hate you guys.