Mommy & Me Time.Mature

June 28th


Viewpoint from Kel:

I stepped outside with my mom who surprised me with friends and family.

"Haha! You were really surprised?"

"Ma, I really was!"

"Good! You needed that! Diggy looked shocked too!"

"Ma, he was!!"

She opened up her arms and I hugged her tightly.

"Ma, this trip was sooo rough!!"

She nodded in agreement.

I finished, "it was awesome and it did solidify how great my relationship is with Diggy. I had a lot of time to think."

"This trip also broke you." She patted the stone and I sat next to her.

"It did. It really fucking did." I jumped up and started to pace around her. "Sorry ma, I don't mean to curse. But it was rough."

"I know you had plenty of time to think about this. What is your plan moving forward?"

"Honestly, I want to keep seeing him. And I got away with not telling him about what really happened so I'm taking it to the grave."

She folded her legs as I continued to ramble on. Sweat by Ciara played from the house.

"Ma, I think he is the one."

She started coughing, "one what?"

"Listen... hear me out."

I sat next to her and grabbed her hand.

"So, I think in the next two to three years, like 2014/2015, I want to relocate to a different area with Diggy and raise Jaiden as our son. But not here or Brooklyn. I liked who I was in Atlanta besides the whole cheating part. I liked being gay. I liked not being the educated hood dude, I really was just Mikhael."

"Really? I thought you had a problem with having two fathers for your son?"

"It does bother me but maybe this is what needs to happen..."

"Have you prayed about it?"

"No, I haven't. Hmph. I haven't spoken to the Lord since I laid in the bath tub in Atlanta."

"Why not."

"I don't know. Cause I'm ashamed."

"You think God doesn't love you anymore?"

"Ma, I don't know."

"Mikhael, he loves you and Diggy. You have to go to him in prayer. He knows your heart."

I looked down, "grandma used to say that all the time."

"She was a smart woman, wasn't she."

I nodded in agreement, " Zera was. But back to the point, ma. I will go to God and later in life I think I will privately ask for his hand in marriage."

Her mouth dropped. I finished, "whenever I date people, I have to provide and be strong. I'm allowed to be weak and sensitive with him. He protects me, mom."

She instantly gave me a hug and shed a tear.

She smiled, "then you have my blessing."

The End

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