Before I Go..

While Tess is being broken up with by the man that she had thought she would marry, she finds that getting over love is hard enough, but finding someone that won't break her heart is a whole other challenge..

What you were wearing that day was quite casual. The night happened to be a bit brighter that day. There was a light wind, so your short follicles were moving in soft movements. You had been waiting. For not too long, I had hoped. I smiled hoping to surprise you. I had closed the door a bit too hard that day, but you had not turned at the sound of your own door. You were staring out your third floor balcony. The stars had been out. The moon had been full. Your posture although normal, was perfect in my eyes. Tilted slightly to the left, you always had stood that way. My white dress flowed at opening the door which led to your balcony. Still you did not turn. Before I had a chance to tap your shoulder or reach to embrace you in some form you said my name, almost to a whisper.

"Tess.." he said. Still he did not turn.

"Hi Max." I uttered confused, I knew something had been off that night. I had waited, feeling my heart sink, but I did not understand this feeling.

"Is something wrong?" I asked matching his tone, but more full of concern. His body had finally matched mine, his eyes were staring at the cold concrete beneathe our feet. They had come up slowly analyzing me from my feet up, I felt my face flush.

"You are beautiful, did you know that?" he blurted, then his hesitation had become obvious.

"I did not say that enough before.."He said, his expression lost in thought.

"Just say it," I said, when I started the tears start to fall, how could have my body understood before my brain? It was all clear, he had told me how he had done away with the ones before me. Here I had stood before him, hoping it was going to be a great day, it was my birthday after all.

"You know its been over.." He said. What he had said sounded more like an obvious accusation. I was struggling with my need to want to scream at him, my want to beg for him before it was too late. When nothing had come out and I stared into his eyes of truth, it had already been too late. I felt all my anger rush through my veins, he had been so great at decieving me. Hiding all the truth from me, when had I become a problem? I had thought of the weekend I had last spent with him. When we had layed in bed together watching movies. We had loved, he had told me and showed me that weekend. We had slept holding hands. When I had left that weekend, he had uttered,

"I love you."

My tears had won at the thought of that weekend.

"I'm sorry" he had uttered again.

"For what?" I asked in disbelief.

"For this," he said.

"Is there someone else?" I had yelled in aggravation.

"No," he said with guilt.

"Then what the hell?!" I had lost it. "We were perfect the weekend before and you just woke up and decided not to love me anymore?!"

"No" He had paused. I looked into his brown sorry eyes. "I have been thinking about it for a while.."

"So why didn't you let me know?"I asked frantic and confused.

"For what?" he asked calmly.

"So umm maybe we could have adressed the issue! So maybe I could protect myself from this blow?! DO you think of anyone other than yourself?" I yelled. Thats when I realized, what was I fighting for? I did not want someone, that no longer wanted me.

As I had begun to walk, I thought to myself "Happy birthday me." I was wiping my tears away. I could feel his eyes on me as I was closing the door behind me to my exit. Normally, I would plead, but my pride had grown since then.

When I had reached the last floor, the weather had changed. It was raining now. With a white dress being a big mistake, wearing high heels had made it worse.

The End

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