Everything is getting to me right now. The sound of the clock ticking. The smell of some kids gum. The dirt on the desk in the corner. My mouth is watering, and i keep drumming my fingers faster and faster. We got to school late and I didn’t have time to have my mourning smoke. See I’m trying to quit but I just cannot get through the day with out one lousy cigarette first thing in the morning before school starts. So here I am sitting in the councillors office losing my mind. I didn’t feel like going to class so I came here. I’m already starting to regret it.

“Brooke?” I hear somewhere across the room. I instantly snap out of my trance of paranoia and look up. Me. Lee is waiting in his doorway as usual. I get up and go into his office; sitting my usual chair furthest away from him. 

“How are you doing?” He asks clicking his pen on and holding a pad of paper in his left hand waiting to write down my every thought. 

“Fine.” I say. Fatal mistake. “Just tired.” I add trying to gain some life points back. 

“Tired.” He repeats as he writes down what looks to be eight sentences in his notebook. “What time did you go to sleep at?” 

“I don’t know. Next time I go to bed I’ll make sure to clock the time and write it down for you.” I say. Now I’m just being rude. 

He glares at me for a second then write down another few sentences. “What time do you get up at? Approximately? Or do you just get up whenever the hell you feel like it?” Now whose being rude. 

“Actually I do know. 7:16 am. Sorry my clock doesn’t tell the seconds though. I’ll guess if you want though.” I reply with a cocky smile. I hate adults. 

“No I’m fine.” He says, not writing down anything for once. “How are your classes?"

“Alright.... boring.” I say knowing where this is going.

“English still a struggle for you? You weren’t doing very well in that subject.” Mr. Lee says looking dead into my eyes as if he could see my soul. 

Dust drifting down from the light catches my eye and I forget what I’m doing. Im immersed in this alternate universe; how free they dust specks must feel, floating and drifting. 

“Brooke?” Mr. Lee asks talking off his glasses and placing them beside his computer mouse.

“Oh, uhm, yeah, its getting easier I guess. Still makes me read sh---stuff out loud though.” I answer looking at my feet, embarrassed. 

“Oh yes, you recently got diagnosed with dyslexia.” Mr.Lee remarks sounding joyous. I scuff the toe of my shoe against the chair leg. 

“Mhm. Great, ain’t it?” I snap back. I hate people knowing it. Some like to treat me different, as if I’m two. I remember the first time I told my English teacher, Mr.McJanet, he talked super slow and with small words as if I barely understood him. Now he acts as if I’m like anyone else. Which I like except for the fact that sometimes I do need a break. 

“On a scale of 1-10 , 1 being not at all, how stressed are you?” He asks changing the subject.

“I don’t know, 7? 8?” I reply shrugging my shoulders. 

“What’s stressing you out?” He asks. So many questions. 

“Everything.” 

Were watching  Romeo and Juliet in drama class. The one with Leonardo DiCaprio. Every girl in the class is swooning over him, even me a little bit. I’ve never been one for blonde hair but theres something about him that just makes me fall in love. I first fell in love with him when I was 4 and watched Titanic. I cry every time he dies. I’m so immersed in his mysterious eyes I barely notice someone walk by me and drop a note.  I look up but I see no one. Im sitting in an end chair and no one is sitting near me. I prefer to watch movies alone and let their alternate worlds consume me. I pick it up and unfold it;

Brooke,

We need to talk asap. Bring Dumont. People are starting to talk about what happened and we need to put an end to it before people figure things out. The last thing you need is cops poking around more than they were. Meet me at my place tomorrow at 6. 

-Sincerely, D. 

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Author guidance for This story

Just a little insight on this story:
It is about something that happened to me and still is happening over the course of half a year or more. The character or person Alex-Brookelle Hailee Hart Reber is me. That is my real name except Alex has 2 x's in it for me in the real world :P No one calls me that except the school thats why it switches between friends/family and the teachers and school board. No I am not actually a murderer its just how I feel about the situation. If you do feel the need to question me about it feel free to post a comment on my wall. Just a little more insight; i didn't actually kill the guy (again) although the way its worded and the dreams work it seems that way :P

Disclaimer: In real life he is not really dead, he is in the hospital getting help but he is alive.

updated May 9 '11 by BrookeCacophony