I tried hard not to fall back to sleep that night. I was too scared. What if I had the dream about my father again? No, I did not want to see it again! I loved my father, I loved him so much that I couldn't bear to see him die three times (Once in real life, twice in my dreams). I wanted to go back in time and start all over again and change what had happen. But if I had managed to emancipate my father, would he have been thankful for it? Or would he be discouraged and irksome?
When mother woke me up, I relized that I had fallen alseep. Fortunately, I didn't have any dreams during that sleep. I felt a little better, but still not ready to talk. I ate my breakfast in silence while Mother pretended to elated for the sake of my sisters. It didn't fool me anymore, I knew she was crying inside. I knew she felt a thing for my father. I knew she loved him so much and was terrified that he died. She must be wondering how in the world we will make it without father, she must be wondering how she can even raise us by herself. I wanted so badly to tell her that we all had faith in her, but that would have to wait.
I hadn't said anything yet.