From my experience, there are 5 kinds of cold; Chilling Cold, Creeping Cold, Partially Cold, Bedroom Cold and Biting Cold. The first is the kind that makes you feel ghostly, when the wind hits you just right and it seems to whistle through your bones and blow right by as if you weren’t even there. This is the teeth-chattering, spine-tingling, knee-knocking type of cold that occurs one day in early January and the Christmas spirit is fading like a distant memory... But not so much that the people at cashiers have stopped talking to you and make friendly conversation. The next is the kind that could easily happen at home. You know you’re fine but the house is a few degrees cooler than you’d like and it’s uncomfortable, but you’re ok until you shiver. Ugh. Partially Cold is – in my opinion – the most annoying of all the Colds, it is when your nose, your toes and a few of your fingers are cold but not the rest of you. It is damn irritating when someone just catches a piece of you and it is frozen. They say ‘poor dear’ and give you a hug. Like that is gonna help. They then give you a jumper or a blanket and you think ‘no, I’m alright thanks, just go back to your knitting’. People. The next is for those who wake up first thing in the morning and do not, for the whole world, want to get out of bed to the thick cold veil surrounding you. You wonder if it is possible to have fog indoors. It saves money to turn the central heating off but when it’s time to get up you wish you had a timer on the blasted thing. It doesn’t make it any easier when you’ve got a beautiful lover beside you, slumbering peacefully. Don’t they look gorgeous when they smile invitingly like that and the teasing twinkle in their eyes makes you just wanna... Stay. The last is painful. Any exposed skin is attacked by tiny teeth that rip into the flesh and bubble the blood beneath. Yet, when you get out of the cold, it leaves a tingling sensation that flows through your body and wakes you up. It is worth getting so freezing that it is unbearable just for those few precious seconds after when pure feeling takes over, so you gradually gain control over your body again. The cold is a frightening thing. So powerful, yet so variable.