Mable was the prettiest soiled dove at the Longhorn, so naturally Archie wanted to see what her bloomers looked like. He couldn’t afford anything else she might have to offer, but lookin’ at her bloomers was free.
Archie picked up his crutch, and slowly and carefully, followed Wilber down the alley. They had to maneuver around the small pile of broken rail pieces. Wilber looked up and pointed to the landings broken rail,”Someone aught a fix that afor someone gets hurt.”
Archie mumbled, “Idiot.”
As they grew closer, they could see some lacy undies flapping in the breeze. “Would you look at that,” said Wilber.
Indeed, the colorful undies were a sight to behold. There were six pairs of panties, pink, red, black, purple, white with frilly lace and yellow.
“Archie, let’s steal us a pair,” Wilber said as he overturned an empty whiskey barrel, climbed up and yanked two pairs of panties from the line.
“Here Archie, stick these in your pocket.”
Then a voice called out, “Stop Thief!”
Sittin in Doc Horner’s office listening to the Doc laugh, was almost as humiliating as the beating he took from Mable. She had looked out her window just in time to see him stuff her bloomers into his pocket. She didn’t take notice of that rat, Archie, hightailing it down the alley, leaving him to face Mable’s wrath.
Doc Horner was bent over laughing, holding his side with one hand. “Wiber, tell me again what she said when she collered you.”
“Doc, that woman let out a string of cuss words as would sizzle bacon. Told me I didn’t have enough sense to spit down wind. And all the time she was beatin me with my own crutch she was neer as nakid as a branding iron.”
The Doc settled down to chuckling as he applied the last plaster above Wilber’s eye. “Wilber, I think you’re gonna live, but my advice to you is to stay away from the Longhorn, and Mable.”
The sun was setting when Wilber hobbled out of the Doc’s office. “Wilber!” called Archie from across the road. “You want to have some fun?”