A smile could break the darkness of my mind, but he does not try. The sunlight rays of morning do nothing to pierce my gloom. The heavy weights of this depression tie me to the ground, stopping light, happiness, the ability to dream. A single smile from a single precious person could shatter the darkness I've wrapped around myself. No one person should have this much power over my emotions, I told myself over and over again back before it got this bad.
I don't exist. I have ceased to exist. Somehow my darkness and gloom has evaded the people who should know me best. My mother, my father, my brother and my sister, my best friend. Those who should know me best cannot see my pain. It only worsens the darkness, having no one to lean on.
"Jackie. Jackie. Jacklyn." I stir from my thoughts to answer the person calling me.
"Are you coming?"
I'm lost. "Coming where?"
She is exasperated now. "To Rowan's."
"Rowan's? Who's Rowan?"
"Jackie, you can't be serious. Rowan. Rowan, the new guy in our gym class? Come on, Jackie. Wake up."
"I didn't know there were any new kids."
"Seriously Jackie? Pay attention more often. Now, are you coming to his party or not?"
A break from the dreary routine of weekends would be welcomed. Something to distract me.
"Sure. I'll come."
"Good." My friend smiles at me. "You need to get out more often."