A career changeMature

"Look Jack it's gonna be cold around that camp fire with no wood, let's just go a little deeper into the forest and get the older, dryer wood. Then we can cook up that fish you caught earlier."

"Ok but I know what your like, I'm not going on one of your mad treks at two in the mornin"

"Chill will ya, Come on!"

"Here we bleedin go" Jack mumbled.Glen led the way deeper into the forest. They reached the peak of the ridge they were on and couldn't believe what they saw on the other side, they lay down out of sight.

"I'm out of here"....Jack whispered....

"Sshhh"...Glen said through clenched teeth....

"Do you know who that is ?......Jack stood up to leave and Glen reached up and grabbed him by his belt and yanked him back down.....a branch broke under Jacks weight and made a loud crack.....

"Go see what that was".....Martin pointed in the direction of the noise.....It couldn't be the cops their not that quick......he thought....

Shavo entangled his way, with a lot of .."fuck !..and ..."shite!"... through the black, dense pine, sticky and impenatrable.....

"Come on he's comin right at us"....Jack said...."If we move now he'll see us, just stay still and shut the fuck up!"....

They watched as the flashlight bobbed up and down like it was floating and gradually started to veer to the left...He stopped within three metres of them, waved the flashlight in a big arc and back again....He turned to head back and stumbled on the uneven ground and fell....

"FUCK ! ME LEG"......

"SHAVO"... Martin half shouted....

"I'm alright,.... I just fell"...

"What the fuck are ya doin ?....

"Get the fuck back over here will ya".....

He made his way back falling once more before he got back onto the small clearing...

"What the fuck were you doin ?....

"And put out that bleedin tourch will ya"

"Its like a fuckin jungle up there".....He was covered in bits of twigs and breathing heavy.....

Martin looked at him as if to say, I dont give a fuck.....

"Well....What was it?..... 

"Couldn't see....nothin there, probably a deer".....

"Well not after the amount of noise you made".....

"Here take that, you can dig".....

Martin handed him the shovel...

"Follow me"....

 

He went over to a tree put his back up to it and started walking, took five paces and checked the compass. He marked it on the rough sketch he had drawn earlier.. He turned a calculated angle, walked seven paces fiddled with the compass again....

"Here, dig right here"....Martin said.

He noted it on the piece of paper and Shavo started digging....

Within no time he was out of breath and slowing down.....

"Gimme that fuckin thing ya useless cunt,".....

He took the shovel off him and glanced at the small hole he'd made and looked back at him with a 'Is that the best you can do?' expression.

"You have to be fit for this game Shavo"...

Martin was knee deep in minutes and Shavo was sittin on a tree stump havin a ciggerette....He pulled his jacket collars up closer around his neck.

"So Martin how come you brought me with you this time, you've never brought anyone before"

"How do you know ?

"I dont"

"So you just assume ?

"Well...Yeah"

"Assumption"....Martin grunted through each shovel full. 

"Is the mother of all fuckups"... 

"But you assume right, your the first, count yourself blessed"

 

"Unless your diggin that hole for me Martin, I do,.... but why?"

He put the shovel down, lit his lighter and looked straight at him with cold dead eyes...... 

"Its your turn....dig!....

 

 

                                                        ***

 

 

 

"Fuck that was close" Jack whispered. 

"Glen, I dont know about you, but I think I just shit myself"

"Look, as long as we dont move or make a sound he's not gonna come back over here. You know what that pine shite is like and we cant use our torches so we just stay put, alright Jack ?

ALRIGHT JACK ?

"Ok, alright" Jacks angular face was furrowed with tension. His black hair was already matted on his face with sweat.

"Thats the General"..Jack said

"I know its the bleedin general"

"If he finds us here we're gonna end up in that hole he's diggin, with who ever else he's got planned for it"

"Look, lets stay calm alright and just see what he's up ta"

"Your not thinkin what I think your thinkin ?

"What ?...Glen looked genuinely puzzled.

"Ah fuck your gonna get us killed"

 

 

They watched as the hole got deeper and deeper until it was chest height, the moon was full and although it was pitch dark in the trees, in the clearing you could just make out their faces.

"Right Shavo grab the bag and bring it over"

Shavo struggled with the bag and tryed to drag it across the rough ground.

"Martin I need a hand"

"I'm startin to wonder why I brought you at all"

Martin jumped out of the hole and dragged the bag over by himself and dumped it in the hole.

"Your bigger than me Martin"

"Bigger me hole"

"Here take the shovel and fill it in" 

"Will ya be able to manage that on your own without fallen in or breakin your neck ?......

He glared at him, then turned and started on the half hour walk back down the mountain.

"I'll be down at the car, hurry up" 

 

                                                         ***

"Their leavin Glen lets go"....

"Thats only the general where's the other guy, look Jack fuckin chill will ya its you thats gonna get us both killed not me so fuckin chill out!".........

 

A cloud had rolled over the moon and they couldn't see him any more but they could hear the odd grunt and the sound of the soil clumping onto the bag and eventually  Shavo appeared, smoking and wiping his forehead. 

He seemed to stare straight at them, so they pushed themselves harder into the ground but he just took one last drag off his ciggerette, stamped it out and was gone.

They stayed there for over a half an hour, argueing with each other, then they heard the sound of a car. 

They listened in silence as the car snaked its way down the small valley, at times it sounded louder as if it was coming back but it gradually dissapeared until all they could hear was the sound of their breathing.

 

"Lets get the fuck outta here Glen !......

They made their way back through the trees back to their tent by the the stream, the fire was just embers so they built it back up but only small. They rolled  a log  close to the fire and sat down.

"I need a joint then I'm gettin the fuck outta here"

"Where are ya gonna go" Glen lifted his hand and turned his palm skyward, "its three in the mornin, theres no buses till seven and the nearest bus stop is ten miles away?"...

"I dont know but I'm gettin the fuck outta here"....Jack pulled out the skins and tryed to skin up a joint but his hands were to shaky...

"Here Glen you do that will ya ? I'm still shaken"

"Will you just chill the fuck out"....Glen said......

"How can you be so relaxed, did you just see what I fuckin saw ?

"No, I had my eyes closed the whole time...course i fuckin saw it, but lets look at this rationally their gone they didn't see us"

"Didn't see us"...Jack said in dissbelief. He stood up.

"Didn't fuckin see us!"....

"He walked right past us!"..... Jack spat through flailing arms. 

"Glen are you ok in the head cause your startin to really piss me, all the way off"

"Will you calm down".....

"I am fuckin calm" Jack screamed...... 

"Stop tellin me to fuckin calm down!"....

 

"For someone who's so paranoid about been found out by the biggest crimminal in Ireland... your makin one fuck of a racket".....

Jack visibly shrank back into himself and sat back down, eyes darting left and right.

"Look whatever he was doin up there you can be gauranteed he wont be back here tonight"

 Glen stared at him with a look of surprise on his round overweight face.

"Your a boxer Jack where's your balls".....

"How do you know he wont be back?" Jack's expression had reverted back to default setting, blank and emotionless. Like he was permanenttly in the final of a Las Vegas poker tournament.

"Common sense Jack, its Saturday night, we're in the middle of the mountains, and he lives in Ranelagh."

"He's goin back to shag his wife or her sister or both."

He finnished off his can, walked over to the tent and pulled out his small camping shovel.

"Here"...Glen said. He handed him the joint he was rolling and a can of Oranjeboom.

"Thats why"...

He threw the shovel up in the air and caught it by the handle.

"I'm goin back up there!".....

 

"Your WHAT?".......

 

 

                                                         ***

"What kep ye?"....Martin said.

"Your big hole is what kep me. Did you have to dig it so fuckin deep?".....

"We're not fuckin amatuers Shavo".....

"Did ya spread out the spare muck?".....

"Yeah"....

"And cover it up with leaves?".........

"Yeah".......

"Your smoke butts, show me your smoke butts?"...........

"What?"........

He slipped into that cold menacing look so quickly and slowed his words.

"Your...............Fuckin................Butts........?"

He spat the last word out.

"I buried them in the hole"

His voice deepened.........

"Shavo!"......

"Look if your worried about evidence we've already left a heap of it up there, hair, bits off our clothes a couple of fag butts is gonna make fuckall difference"

Martin held his stare forever......

"Here"...........

He threw him the car keys........

"Your drivin!"......... 

 

                                                      ***

"I cant beleive what I'm hearin"..Jack said.

Next to the shovel Glen laid out his camera, a map and his small bag.

"Why the fuck would you want to dig up someone's grave?".....

"That was no body Jack, he's after knockin somethin off"....

"And your going back up there to see what it is?"........

"Yeah....You comin?".......

He didn't answer......

"Suit yourself"

He put everything into the bag, took the joint out of Jack's mouth and dissappeared into the darkness.

Jack sat there in dissbelief staring at the spot where Glen had vanished.

"FUCK.....I cant believe I'm doin this"

"Wait up"

 

                                                        ***

Further up the mountain a car slowly snaked its way down the small narrow road, occasionally throwing it's lights across the small valley.

"Get back Shavo there's a car comin".........

They hid in behind a granite boulder at the end of the track and watched as the car slowly drove past.

They listened as it faded, then seemed to grow louder as it twisted it's way down the mountain.

"Who the fuck was that?" Shavo said.....

"I dont know, probably just a local but I smell a rat Shavo and I'm not takin any chances"....

He pushed the shovel into Shavo's chest....

"We're goin back up there!"...........

"For what?".....

Martin raised his eye brows and tilted his head......

"Your poxy butts!"..........

 

                                                        ***

Glen made his way slowly back to the clearing, he removed his bag, took out the camera and started to take picture's.

"Who the fuck do you think you are Columbo?".........Jack said.

He continued to take pictures from different angle's then he took the map out and started to locate his position.

"Give us some light here will ya Jack?"......

"Use the small torch not the big one"......

Jack looked at him....

"I thought you were garuanteed he wouldn't be back?".......

"I am, but you can never be too carefull"

He circled his position on the map, picked up the shovel and started to dig.

"They didn't cover it up very well did they?".....

"Some fuckin general"

"Look"...

Glen picked out a ciggerette butt from the dirt.

"Evidence!".....

"And what exactly are you gonna do with all this evidence....Sherlock fuckin Holmes?"......

"Nothin....Just in case".........

"In case of what?" Jack spat.....

"Here less talkin more diggin!".....

"It's your turn".......

Jack made light work of it he was super fit and powerfully built.

"I've hit somethin!"......

"Can you pull it out?"......Glen said..

"Here grab a corner"........

They both hauled the bag up onto the side and opened it up.

"What the fuck are they?".........

"Looks like canvas, it is, their paintings"

"He's after knockin off a fuckin gallery"........

 

 

                                                       ***

 

"It's forty minute's back up that fuckin mountain Martin"..Shavo said.

"You'll be a lot longer than forty fuckin minutes in Mountjoy if you get caught"......

"Now move it!"....

They set off back up the mountain again, the gravell track crunching beneath their feet. Shavo lit up another ciggerette.

"So are you gonna tell me?".......His face dissapeared behind a cloud of smoke momentarily.

"Tell ya what"......

"Why you brought me"

"Why do you think?".....Martin said.

"My attention to detail?"......

Martin stopped dead in his tracks.

"Your a real fuckin smart arse Shavo Hogan do ya know that!".......

They started walking again.

"Your my right hand man Shavo and your here in case anything happens to me"

"What do ya mean Martin?".........

"I want someone else to know where the paintings are, and that someone",.......He lifted his finger " is you!"......

The track zig zagged up the mountain and they had just turned one of the hair pin bends when Martin stopped again.

"Did you hear that?".....

They both fell silent.....

"Hear what?"........

"I heard voices!"........

"Your hearin voices now Martin?"   "I always knew you were a schizo"......

"BE QUIET!"........

He sniffed the air "I can smell smoke"

"I can't hear a thing Martin"......

"Stay off the gravell Shavo its too noisy walk on the edges, on the grass".......

"Come on I definately heard somethin"....... 

They continued on up the track and then both of them stopped at the same time.

"I heard it that time"..Shavo whispered... "sounds like someone" they both turned toward each other and  said it at the same time....

"Diggin"

They quickened their pace and started to crouch as the voices got louder. When the reached the point where they turned in, they stopped and crouched right down. Martin put his finger over his lips and then pointed to his ear. 

He reached down and picked up a cigarette butt off the ground and held it up in front of Shavo's face like it was nuclear waste. Martin moved off and gave a silent army like signal to follow.They crept to within a few meters and watched......

After a few minute's Martin put his hand up to Shavo's face and started counting down with his fingers....

Five......Four........Three..........Two..........One.............

They both stood up but still in the shadows....

 

"Well, well if it isn't Laurel and fuckin Hardy"........

 Glen instinctively made a run for it.......

"SHAVO GRAB EM".......

Martin pulled out a gun and pointed it straight at Jack......

"Dont even fuckin think about it"

Jack stumbled backwards, He was on his back, on all fours and inching slowly up the mound of dirt he'd just made.

Shavo came back with Glen by the scruff of the neck and pushed him down on the mound beside Jack.

They all fell silent. Martin made the most of the tension. He casually walked over to a tree stump and sat down never taking his eyes or the gun off both of them.

"So what do we have here boys"

"M..M..Martin its not what you think we were just havin a look we weren't gonna take anythin Martin I swear......Jack was sweating now and pale.

"We're on first name terms already"

"Whats your name?"....Martin barked...

"J.J.Jack o Brien"...

"You?....He looked at Glen....

"Patrick".....Jack flicked his head towards Glen and back again. Martin jumped up cleared the hole in one movement and pushed the gun hard into the side of Glen's face.....

"Your fuckin lyin!"......

"Its Glen its Glen Dunne 11 Oakwood cresent Finglas....

"Right this down Shavo"...Shavo patted himself down looking for a pen.

"I've no pen Martin, have you got one"

"For fuck sake Shavo, no I don't"

"Lads have any of you got one"..Shavo said...

"I dont fuckin believe this".....Martin said. ....

"Glen went to grab his bag"

"No ya don't"....Martin kicked it over to Shavo....

He took out the camera and held it up with a 'what the fuck is this' expression. Then the map and held that up too and finnaly the pen and some paper.

"Right eleven what?"....

"Eleven Oakwood cresent Finglas Shavo Jaysus"....Martin said.

When he was finnished he pointed the pen at Jack.

"Jack O'Brien 32 Ballygall Parade Finglas Dublin 11"

"Phone"....

"835675"

"You Patrick?"

"834921"   

"Now"...Martin stood up and walked back around the other side of the hole. 

"There's only one thing worse than robbin off a robber! He swung the gun around and levelled it straight at Shavo's head, point blank range.

"And that's a snitch"

 

"Martin....... what the fuck are ya doin?"....

He said nothing.

"I'm no snitch Martin, fuck sake we grew up together"

CLICK..... He cocked the gun..........

"MARTIN......MARTIN"........

He closed one eye and steadied his arm.....

"MARTIN PLEASE NO".......

 

CLUNK.....

Shavo screamed like a girl.

Martin burst into fits of laughter and Jack and Glen looked at each other in dissbelief, sweating and gasping for air.

"Martin what the fuck are ya doin are ya tryin to give me a fuckin heart attack"

Martin smiled........."Just keepin ya on your toes Shavo, just keepin you on your toes"....... 

 

"Right lads put the stuff back in the bag, put it back in the hole and fill it in... now"

The both of them were still in shock and didn't move...

"NOW!".....

They jumped up simultaneously and started clawing at the soil with their bare hands.

"Shovels, lads shovels"....Martin said.....

They watched as the two dutifully followed orders and Shavo smoked nervously. He walked over to Martin.

"Relax Shavo there wasn't even any bullets in it, look"...he said out of the corner of his mouth.

He popped open the barrell and showed it to him.

" Martin....There's one in it"

"What?"....

He looked at the lone bullet in the barrell.

"So there is.....Jaysus that was a close one Shavo"

He put his hand on his shoulder.

"It's not the first time I nearly got you killed and it wont be the last"

 

They frog marched the two of them back down the half hour walk to the car and just before it was in view they stopped.

"Shavo go get somethin to tie these two pair of cunts up with"....

"Martin p... p.. please dont kill us Martin we wont rat I swear"....

"You must carry your balls around in a wheel barrow do ya?"....

"What?"......

"You've got some balls tryin to rob off me".....

He eyed Glen up.

"Your the hard man of the two are ya?...First you try to rob me, then ya lie to me"....

He stared at him eye to eye.

 

"Right lads what would you do in my position".....Martin said pointing the gun at them like a finger....

They both looked at each other.

"Well here's what I want you to do!"

"Jack I want ya to knock your hard man of a mate here..... out cold!"........

They looked at each other again, but Jack's face changed and a half smile played on his lips.....

Glen was just about to say somethin when out of no where and lighting quick he caught him with a blinding left hook. His knee's crumpled and folded beneath him and he was out.

"That's some punch you have there son I could use a punch like that, you should be a boxer".....

"I am" Jack said sheepishly.....

Glen eventually got back up rubbing his jaw.

"It's your turn".....

Glen socked him one and Jack just stood there as if he was just hit by a two year old. Martin burst out laughing at Glen, still rubbing his jaw.

Shavo came back with the rope and some rags. They tied them up and blindfolded them and marched them to the car, put them in the back and drove off.....

They drove back up the mountain for over an hour and then pulled up. Shavo reached in behind and removed the blindfolds.

"Right here's what I want you pair a cunts to do on your way home tonight"...Martin ordered as he swung round in his seat.

"When you eventually find your way out of here, at some stage, your gonna slash every tyre on every car in Phisborough and if I don't read about it in the paper tomorrow I'm comin after the pair of yis"....

"Shavo get them outta the car!"......

Shavo dragged the two of them out of the car, threw them into the ditch got back in and drove away.

 

With some effort they both managed to crawl out of the ditch, they inched their way over to each other and without saying a word, tryed to undue each others knots.

"Where the FUCK are we".....

They both stood up rubbing their wrists.....

"I recognise this place it's Sally's Gap, we're fuckin miles away".....Jack said, he turned lighting fast and floored  Glen with another sweet punch.....

Glen rolled around on the ground in agony.

"What was that for?".....

"WHAT WAS THAT FOR?"....He kicked him hard in the stomach.

"WHAT WAS THAT FOR?"....He stood over him half bent down screaming in his face.

"YOU NEARLY GOT ME KILLED BACK THERE, AND NOW I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF FUCKIN NOWHERE WITH THE BIGGEST CRIMMINAL IN IRELAND WANTIN TO FUCKIN KILL ME"

He took off in the direction of Dublin.

"YOU CAN GO FUCK YOURSELF".......

 

 

 

 

"We have a snitch among us Shavo".....

"You don't honestly think it's me do ya?"......

"I dont know what to think,........ but would I be tellin you if I did!".....

"I have the IRA on me back Shavo, their after threatin me. They said I'm top of their list".......

"Bollix....That's heavy Martin".......

"They don't fuck around"....

"Fuck them....They don't scare me!"........

He turned the last few corners before making his way onto the main road back to Dublin.

 

 

********************************************************************************

 

Martin giggled to himself as he sipped on a cup of tea and read the morning newspaper.

 

 

........CAR TYRE'S SLASHED.........................................

What look's like to be the work of the General and his gang, over fifty cars in the suburb of Phisborough have had their tyre's slashed........................

"Frances....Bring in the phone"

In the most posh voice he could muster.......

"Hello could I speak to Glen Dunne please".... 

"Who will I say is calling?".....a woman's voice said.

"It's Martin"......

 

"His new boss"......... 

 

 

The End

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