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...s at BT. How can I help you?"

"Ah - Thomas. Are you the leader of your world?"

"The leader of my world? Just a moment, please... just a moment, please... just a moment, please... hold on..."

The alien creature was looking meaner than ever. For the first time Jemima felt scared as he glared at her.

"What's the problem, caller?" asked another voice on the line.

"The problem, my friend, is that I am in one of the fastest and deadliest spaceships in the universe and am training my laser gun STRAIGHT AT YOUR MISERABLE PLANET. I shall blast your pathetic apology for a "civilisation" out of the way unless you PUT ME THROUGH TO YOUR LEADER RIGHT NOW."

"Right, I sympathise absolutely with your problem, sir, but they seem to have put you through to the wrong department... just a moment, please... just a moment, please... the line's going to go dead for ten minutes but please don't think that means we've forgotten about you..."

"DAAAAAAH!"

Jemima Watches the End of the World

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