Marty couldn't resist seeing the building where he had been incarcerated the previous year. He had a weird mix of emotions as he arrived very early on that crisp but bright 2009 winter morning. A lot had happened during the last year (not least the constant delays in the opening of HM Pig World).

Next to him was someone who had become a rather surprising addition to his friends: Crispin Drummond, the cause of his brief spell in the Pink Tower before its change of use. Maybe something about their incarceration (for two different reasons) and subsequent release had brought them together. Or maybe the fact that no-one else would talk to either of them.

"Keep up on, Marty, old bean!" cried Crispin. "We might get to see Her Maj or one of the old Firm opening the joint."

*          *          *           *          *           *           *          *           *          *

The Chief Co-ordinator of Pig World, Sir Desmond Tretharius, waited anxiously for the appearance of rince Philip, who was due to open the place. Nothing was happening so he knocked on the wall and pushed the curtain aside...

To his horror, there was Prince Philip with a blaclava covering his face, massive blue-tinted glasses and his feet on two great big skis.

"One learns to ski," came the muffled voice.

"Absolutely, Your Royal Highness, but I think today we're going to be opening Pig World."

He gently removed the superfluous garments, revealing the prince in a suit.

*          *          *          *          *          *           *          *          *         *

Marty and Crispin heard the end of The Prince of Wales' speech about the environmental impact of the disappearance of pigs with mild interest. They were keen to get in and start mucking about. They couldn't help giggling, though, at the bizarre figure with the covered face who suddenly appeared besides the Prince, being chased by embarrassed-looking officials.

"One learns to ski," said Prince Philip.

Marty and Crispin tried not to laugh. They didn't wish another spell inside for laughing at the Royals.

RATE THIS BRANCH!