Step 6: Make yourself seem attractive

Make yourself seem attractive? Good luck with that one Roseanna!

About the only item of makeup I owned was one tube of mascara (is that even what they call them? Tubes?) and that was all clumpy and horrible anyway.

Abandoning all hope of performing well in this chapter, I turned to someone for advice. Well... not just someone. The school chav, to be exact. I'm not kidding - you could actually scrape five layers of makeup off her face without even touching her skin.

"Um... Chantelle?" I said cautiously, aware of the eyes of her posse boring into my head. "Could I have a word? In private?"

"Eer, ite lad? Wot is it larr? Please, I en't got all day. Giss a chance to, like, breathe would ya?"

"Huh?" the chav-speak was too new for me to understand.

"Babe. Is it a guy? Coz I've bin wiv in bed wiv three diff'rent guys this week. I don' think I've got time fer a low-life like you."

"Okay... Whatever." I said, and walked off. God, chavs.

So I went shopping after school in the village. On my own, no surprises there.

Ooh, that shop has makeup in the window. Hmm... Superdrug? Might as well give it a try...

In Superdrug, I walked straight over to the makeup counter. I grabbed the best (and cheapest) things I could find and rushed out of the store before anybody saw me there. After all, Roseanna? In a makeup shop? Per-lease.

The next day in Maths:

"Roseanna?" I felt a warm glow inside - He remembered my name! "What have you done to your FACE?!?" 

The End

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